Holy cross

Great question where is global planet swag

housed by men. Top. Men.

Great question is it the paddle that makes a pickle ball player

it’s being smugletes…..smug a clock news at the msnerrrr. ruff!!

Great question. Could you use steak ems as a wig

aged provolone. peppers and onions to have that highlight feel. i like bread crumbs. maybe cha-baaaaaata. at your leeey-zur. and the best part you might even make page six. could be the rage. could be the sage. bona-pete

great question if your leader is a smurf, would you know you are in a cult

they brainwash you. a little generous are we. so many people. and that, is why the zombies won’t eat tonight

Great question if i die, and if i die in a hospital would i get a chalk outline

wiped behind and a thunderous bill. thunderous.

Great question is death better business than baby

unless its P.P. than its a two-fur

Great question what happens if another country does better at global getting it on

It’ll be a hard day’s hoping. if you aint the number one earth saver, you’re just the first loser.

Great question best place to have a bike lane

in your sights.

great question if you have no friends, can you have no enemies

cept coma. coma, where art thou? are you snug, do you have a bug? coma, do you cry in your dry, do you lie in silence? coma, i took your socks.

Great question is it true, the person who calls another person a racist, is free from being a racist

school yard justice.

great question if time takes time, why does ABC evening news take so much of it

You have to turn it around. what would they be doing if they were not on abc evening news? they are on a generous scholarship from the american foundation.

Great question isn’t the cause of global warming loneliness. and if loneliness is the problem, why do the connected mock the plight of disconnected

we are cruel in our graces.

Great question should moisturize be the 11th commandment

amen

Great question should you be grateful that you can be offended

i think it is a harbinger that things are so well.

Great question. If you fart at the state fair, is it a fart

technically no since no one there earns enough money to be offended.

great question was jebus onboarding

nailed it

Great question why do we attempt to quantify pain

to believe you have it worse. moo-hoo-hahaha!

Great question if you do the gender portal, should you be able to vote twice

yes. one vote per crotch. it’s a whole new thing.

Great question. if you go out of your way at the clinic, just damn near perfect, honor in numbers and numbers don’t lie. if you reach for the fiteen abortion that day, do you feel pretty damn good.

some days you wonder why you and the hero look the same.

Great question what do we do with all the shootings

buy the guns off of people. Call ASIA, tell them moment is too hot.

Great question have we done a disservice to hope

i think that is fair. keep it true to keep it real

Great question what if the planet is durable like a good planet is

no! we have all the facts. less you share them. No! our facts. get your own facts. jerks.

Great question would you need two people to mug a conjoined

who would do that but for the circus

Great question how scared am i right now

Hurting myself is on the table. i think it is the pandora box. at the least it is the nap of deceased that buys relief.

Great question do i regret what i hoped my dad would be

not really. the wondering doesn’t go away but the fact remains

Great question do people go to colorado to fart

it ain’t the cuisine.

Great question have men started all the wars

there’s that

Great question do you pay the truck to be in the truck commercial

they are the ones doing all the work.

Great question will we know the exact person who saves the earth

bobby mcgee.

Great question Starbucks in the crapper

would make great pee trough banter that could really make a live album. so could adding catalog to the stream selfish wonder din.

Great question. is religion better with live music

music bonded harmonic function and how do we not want to serve it to the ivy on hot slice of dis. may not be real but as the hate is renewed it feels good to return the volley by golly.

Great question is this a grand time for news

never been able pull us apart like the grand pliars of their fault.

Great question does dying your hair make others think you are horny

as a hoot owl.

Great question should therapists be continuosly pouring scotch

Proven. you are smarter when you pour hard liquor. got the couple of glasses in hand, nice bottle of expensive wood kissed fluid and some intimate listening. how does it not work that you would be smart for all of that. shiiiiit.

Great question if we had less people would we have less guns

we are gonna have guns. murder. mayhem because we keep on peeling the fruit of trust til all that is left is the seed to which will take decades to bear the fruit we lost over conflicts never needed but for the instigators of disease.

great question would a vegan wear a baseball glove

no! must be true to the allegiance. hard life being absolute.

Great question are men meaner than women

women live longer, that’s pretty damn mean. we take care of our bodies. and we take care of the check. oh, that is so sexist. what does that mean? it means what we want it to mean. good luck with that.

great question do we have a definition of racism

opportunity

great question if you scratch a coma’s ear does their leg twitch

cutest darn thing

great question can we find it in ourselves to be stronger of character and bigger than defeat

we have. we can. we will.

great question are yoga teachers caddies of the soul

don’t they know it. still don’t know how exercise relates to wisdom.

great question you can speed if you go in a circle

try telling that to bucc-a-roo bonzai on your tail with cherries screaming like a stuck whale.

great question if you carry your yoga mat with you is that like me carrying a knapkin

one out of the two be clean. har har har

great question where is thy enemy for women

the thin woman with hair that ain’t thinner than the thighs

great question are swimmers marinated

Courtesy of Mr Freely no less.

great question how do you get out of a rut

find someone to steal energy from and then you have to break the ice of stagnation a bit to do it a bit more. maybe you break it enough put your head thru and see a new breath for a change of direction. you gotta be starting something.

great question if we can’t imagine what it is like for you, why bark when we don’t even try

that’s not the point. au contraire, mon frère. heh, heh, heh. you want the juice without the squeeze. no bueno.

great question is tv watching hereditary

hard to fight it. only because as you get older you live in your home.

great question what do you eat after your patient dies

i think you would eat what Louis tells you to eat.

great question would they have a orphanage for smart kids

boarding school.

great question what is the over under on toaster strudel

there is no toaster strudel. Only drool

great question are we doing okay if grape juice can be so expensive

to think what we spend on grapes bathed in time. and we think we have problems.

great question is the military the same as porn

nobody watches but everybody uses. shiiiiiit.

great question why do we pay to watch people who have energy

so we have the bastards in our sight.

great question if you are in a coma and the do good urrrrrrrs save the earth come all they are,

you wake up. are you allowed to take credit

no. nitpicky. thus the features of the finicky.

great question is tay’s greatest feature that she cannot be criticized.

seemingly.

great question should they raise the rate for abortions

tax women’s choice. tax them for all their worth. and, if you got smokes while relinquishing the one night stand, easy peazy cause we know smokes may kill but the kill doesn’t smoke.

great question if we used the fear we have to love each other would we stay a little longer

at the least the choice would be a bit more difficult. my heft is squeezing out my love. which is nice. fat and love don’t get along with blubber. it’s why i’m a giver

great question did bike lanes cause waco

it’s a reach just like corraling our streets

great question would it be cheaper to buy a baby at a gas station than a 20oz soda

and yet we skip the new new for a bit of som som. we have to love us. the fucking hilarity. ha…ha ha.

great question who are those cookies for in the pet store

why, why do you tempt us when no dog gives a bark but you want me to eat them. you need me to eat them on that wall.

great question should there be ballet during lent

no. why? only the penetant ballerina will pass. and are the penetant? squirmy.

great question should you be happy to have cancer

not bad. millions on your side. people feeling you up. drugs galore. let f-bombs fly. eat like a sewer. wiener.

great question less poor people, would we not know where to send our money

earth. earth. eating our money like a mother fucker. and for what? for what? so the fight of left is funded against the plight of the right. shiiiiiit. cirlces. they fuck you up.

great question when did word of god need a soundtrack

when people would pay for it

great question do peleton’s come with humor

communal. thunder. wedgie. couple of thousand dollars for anal. go figure.

great question is life what we see or don’t see

feelings are invisible. power is unimaginable. farts are but wind.

great question do you shake the hand of someone who goes off the grid

send them your regards. it’s a natural life. it’s a natural lie. we are at peace. we can hurry that up.

great question when do you fart in yoga class

you know damn well. downward dog, upward heat.

great question would jebus wear the nails around his neck

that would imply personality. don’t see it. tell me where and i will tell you no.

great question where does the hate come from

education

great question is pregnancy a nine month cure for silence

yep. can’t help it. got life in me. so does tequila and that goes okay.

great question is honesty based on the degree’s of lying that is capable

have you lost weight, you look better than ever. heh, heh, heh. lying is breathing because only at the end of the day do you see the truth in light.

great question is hunting the weakest excuse to own a gun

protect my rights as an american. that why you have so many them things called friends. i reckon my lady and my truck. and my dog. love my dog. love my lady. shit. no one mess with me. and why would they, you seem to have done a nice job on self……….ha! ha!

great question if you talk about jebus does that make you understand love

talk about jebus might as well get on the bus to bumfuck USA. taint a bigger bore in the lore.

Great question can you live longer making fun of people

live better.

great question how close are we to knowing everything we need to know

chuck norris. chuck fucking norris.

great question is it too easy to be fat

too to easy to like being fat

great question would it be wrong to bring your kid to puppy training class

i think it would be fine. might wanna take that collar off. people talk .

Great question what are you suppose to do if you are sad

stay away from grey’s anatomy.

great question what if i am hurting because i have an emotional diagnosis relative to my understanding how life is suppose to be

heh, heh, heh. as it has been said and said never enough,’ no one cares. ‘ anthem for the ages.

great question animals don’t marry. are they smarter

yes by god. course, they don’t flush. don’t cook. don’t clean. and we love em more than we have ever loved before, only because they let us.

great question what’s the point of tanning

your a majority going in, a minority coming out.

great question if you mount a deer head, what message does that say to the spouse

duck

great question should vegans breast feed

no. milk from a meater. can’t have it. can’t. but i only eat plants. and the cattle graze.

great question what excuse will work all the time

someone step on a duck

great question does it make me feel better that toilet paper is more important than the ny times

makes me go laugh. ha ha. why not economist? skidmarks.

great question could nanners teach pound

if not who i just don’t want to know.

great question if you are funny are you less likely to be a criminal

poor, but innocent

great question did han, after defrosting, have the most epic pee ever

jebus getting into the pearly gates. i don’t think he would have wizzed during the ascension. might ruin the story.

great question do cannibals have bad breath

to die for…….youch. you are right. killer breath….oooph, how you doin.

great question is the morning yawhn better than the evening yawhn

evening. day is behind you. some accomplishment. relaxing. your feet smell but you like it. the hair has suffered. frustrated but can tolerate it. kids done. work over. traffice gone. bottle tilted. glass catch’s. stomach agrees.

great question would i have them take out my fat after i die so i can be viewed skinny at the wake

i would. it’s been a struggle it would be nice to know i would go out a winner. free soap while i last.

great question is it tough because my brother did more to raise me than my dad did

frustrating that i can see him in me more than the old man

great question could one of the conjoined be a ventriloquist to the other

i have time. i do. but, it’s a helluva question. i think so.

great question do you bury the gum with the gum chewer

don’t want to gum up the wood chipper. then the warranty. then you start shopping around for a new model and the wheels come off from what you are trying to do. shame.

great question would msnbc bong their farts

i would not put it past them. they will come around again when the vixen of vapidness runs for the house of trump

great question could you say that, if, if there were no bike lanes JFK would be alive.

yes you can say it. how? can’t prove it otherwise. that is a silly argument. thus, your definition.

great question why are tv food people happy

free tp. white teeth. clean clothes. pancake on the face. bark like a dog.

great question if hall is suing oates can honey bunches testify

not a proud day in the honey bunches world. court is the chasm of humanity

great question should wonder bread own a duck farm

yes. cuts out the middle man. fuckers bite. good thing we have an armada ready to bring earth to the dining room table.

great question should shorter people get smaller utensils 

You don’t want that awkward moment.  Then again, you do.

great question do i wonder how my pop got to spend his life not telling the truth

i did until i realized if you limit your chances, the odds are in your favor.

great question person commits suicide, what are you suppose to think

trust that they did what was best for them at that time.

great question if you sled dog, is that 8 land mine factories you cleaning up

thought so. god damn north pole could blow at any minute. which makes me appreciate the habits of the cat that much more. you can say dogs are better, but are they smarter? dogs make america safer…..for cats. heh, heh, heh. their is artistry in feline wizardry.

great question is it spooky that i see my brothers face when i look at mine

and the voice. and the isms. and it all is a tough truth that out there is a part of me

great question through it all, do i miss my dad?

i want to know that i could if i need to

great question how do you know you are a good phone jockey

when you are validated by the machine’s candor.

great question where will they bury the body of the first person to give tay a bad review

arrowhead.

great question do women realize men gave them purpose

no. and they probably never will. how do we carry the hurt? after a while you just expected to be neglected.

great question why is dancing awkard

vulnerability. the fear we have for the truth be told

great question do i see the kids taking violin and think bad thoughts about my upbringing

i could but life is not over and the humor i enjoy has calming affect in the face of active parents.

great question what is the difference between a retreat and using the all gender bathroom

jebus. not jebus.

great question should red lobster have mammograms

yes. be great. think like you would if you thought like you could

great question do people with higher education talk more

have so much to say. we know so much. of course you do. how be taught. exactly. my education has opened so many doors. but not closed a particular mouth.

Great question if, if you work at sea world, with a prosthetic arm, and the whale bites the arm off, but, before you go to bed that night you put a new arm on, can you say the whale bit your arm off

no camper, you’ve had the extra arm all along.

great question do vegans shower in the summer

hard to shower in a tent

great question when is dancing an art

waiting for the pee trough to open up

great question would i name a star after lebowski

little lebowski urban achiever.

great question can we have a time share with a kid

we can. afford childcare. cut down on diapers. still have me time. atta you.

great question when are facts facts

when they lift your logic to a higher ground. never gonna tear you down.

great question should the poor be allowed to save the earth

no! bad poor. bad, bad, poor. only the well off people can. jerks.

great question what is the most dangerous thing to man

youth

great question after two years will leggings be able to stand on their own

the conversations don’t. we are better off for talking. and we are better off at not giving a damn what you are……to.

great question does it count as much if a muskie eats your kid not a shark

it does not. you hope to get that big time moment….cut open the gut and find ralphy and a whiskey plate.

great question can a black person de-racism anything

i would say yes. would they need a stick with water? what good does that do? blesses. good fur you.

great question what is the safest man to a woman

a dead man

great question if you date a model can you only walk fifty feet

true. but, you don’t get lost

great question do you dust a bomb

not a buh.

great question if you are part of the cult, who replaces the tp

it doesn’t matter cuz it is a cult. well, if you begin to think in the crapper, maybe you think twice to be listening to smurf. you were not there. seems like you were not either.

great question if you go to a show on broadway, is that the peak of your urinal life

peeing in space has to rank pretty high. last wizz in prison. first wizz with new tallywacker.

great question do we have enough time to love anymore

we think proximity is love. prison tells you it isn’t. alas, we must touch. visibly. invisibly. day upon day. build into the stars the reason why our love shines true.

great question do i believe in emotional induced illness

i do. when do you get help? if you can’t leave michigan.

great question do you feel bad for that first thought after a tragedy

it’s the first thought you say that needs a chaparone

great question which animal would you like to eat your kid

honey badger. yes, then, then you can say that about those stinking badgers. harrrrrumph

great question can i hold my dad guilty of his life

candy talk.

great question are awkward moments the olive in the martini

yes. they are not everything but damn it if they are not something.

great question would jebus walk on a spill of clearly canadien

clearly canadien is a canadien you clearly want to steer from. you’ve got mafia too. we have roving gangs stealing land and yet we have fervor over kimmel’s and bits.

great question what am i trying to understand

how many people i need to have in my life.

great question what role does farting play in a divorce

no longer does the febreze have to sneeze in your air. free come all to let it out of the dairy air.

great question what is the endline for global repair

when one side has all the other side’s money

great question are muffins happier because they are born in the morning

so are our constitutions. bah da bing, bah da zoom.

great question are short women happier because they have less leg to shave

gratitude if you have the attitude.

great question would it be okay if i was brined

could be the new lotion. oooooph. smell like a pickle, easier to tickle. not so fickle. cost more than a nickle. better than cole trickle

great question if one vegan caught another vegan eating meat, would that vegan have to go to vegan anonymous

than those unfortunate would go to vega-anon.

great question why do butchers look like someone you don’t want to touch your meat

see how they like being in showcase showdown. harrrrrrrrrrrrumph!

great question is cancer the premier disease

youth

great question did women invent breast implants

your welcome. we’ll add it to the bill like our deaths charging a hill.

Great question how many parents are at the beach trying to get junior a little closer to that moving triangle

you want to deny, but, happens all the time

great question should they have drugs at hospice

what is the worst that could happen? cannonball coming…..heh, heh, heh.

great question is it too much to see a parent not being able to spend more for their kids at the state fair

at least it made me feel sad. true, i was a kid and not the emotionally scabbed over generous item of the moment.

great question if you have a couple of truths in your life is that all you need

i think so. when you can lean against certainty the rest walks away.

great question twenty thousand dollars for a guy who cuts the head off of dead sea lion

person cuts me off in traffic and that is okay…….shiiiiiiiiiiit.

great question is maggie the great doomed by the weight of her preciousness

one could believe. she is so strong for fighting. fighting for what. well, for us. yep. selling victimhood never goes out of style. tell me it’s not my fault and i will make you rich. fa, fa-oooooools.

great question little weird is it that gas stations have high quality fritters

can’t clean the john but the fritter is out of this world. I’ll take the sugar, leave the pesch.

great question what was woman’s first thought

huh, cold out.

great question is it upsetting how easy it would be to kill somebody today

i don’t get upset over that. maybe i don’t care enough anymore. maybe so. i wish i was always right about how i feel in relation to the world. sometimes i am not.

great question difference between depression and misery

depression gets you drugs, misery gets you drunk.

great question would it be wrong to get uber eats to a viewing

if we don’t work at humor we’ll all be in the throws of a viewing.

great question what can’t you get by saying your terminal

enhanced i.d.

great question could the b-52’s beat the go-go’s in pickleball

testing you. what would they be if they played pickleball but for the sport of desperation.

great question does fuck have more energy than caffeine

damn right

great question best place to lose your kid

any place a animal bigger than a cheerleader has an appetite for your youngin. oh no, that would be horrible. i know. I imagine it will give the animal heartburn and bloating, but they’ll get over it.

great question do two women own the same handbag

not on the same day.

great question if i caught a ‘big fish’, would i throw in a kid to make it fair

i would because i am not selfish.

great question hat trick in detroit and you don’t have a octopus, what do you throw

‘junior, prepare for departure’ they might bounce but the ice will keep the swelling down. maybe the glide. maybe

great question if you fly your own plane, how soon do you have to tell someone you flew your plane

before the gee a teen gets turned on. want to get ahead on that.

great question should i bring a leesh so people can pet my loneliness

what do you think we’re doing. shiiiiiiiiiit

great question difference between cheerleader and dance team

the whine.

great question would i squat on a property brothers house

pond.

great question are we lucky jebus didn’t come down on 9/11

that would have been awkward. whaddya do? maybe you have him take the kid to get a x-ray.

great question if you don’t say please before noon what should you expect in return

something shiny and peppy. might sting, but you’ll forget it soon enough.

great question theoretically is today a blood bath

ooooph. push your buttons. push, push, push. i moved some weight around. getting ripped. in three years. making down payments on my future. this is now.

great question why haven’t we won all the wars all the time

i don’t know. i don’t. what the fuck? how did that happen? is it possible that war is a thought with no end but for a victory to no peace.

great question could you use a pitbull to help teach a kid to ride a bike

might not see the kid for a day or two but that’s tough love. fist bump that.

great question what do you do when everyone irritates the fuck out of you

die a little inside because you know there is nothing legal to be done out of the onslaught of annoyance civilization springs on you when tis needed to be in front of the crowd.

great question if your boss farts when you are sharing a elevator, a real gorgeous paint thinner, and someone walks in and asks who farted, what do you say

i should have fixed the grips on the club

great question does the double deuce allow trivia night

if it’s okay with the stranger, okay with me.

great question. in the end do we learn what we need to know

i think we do. we get what we want and in that is the culmination of our knowledge.

great question should you be able to trade a kid for a dog

if you could get out of debt losing a kid, in a heartbeat. in the end we all find our own love anywho.

great question can you keep the newborn in a yeti

sure, you might have other problems. but, keeping the kid cool will not be one of them

great question do the poor have bad manners

especially with the slippery snails. [hint: prince in the bathtub]

great question can you spoon with a coma

they say no, but they are really saying don’t let us catch you. fist bump that. all day long. i think if one conjoined goes into a coma they would have to put the second one in. yeah. good question.

great question is it wrong to start over on a new planet

if ever there was a geographic. if we live below just on earth for what will we be on mars but infants to the sun.

great question would it be wrong to bring a cage while babysitting

I think you start cage, then, then if they don’t bite, just shackles. we love how we love

great question would i yell as a coach

i don’t know what you gain. it’s the heat of the moment. bah! yell in the office an door hits you on the behind. but if ball is in play, yell away. shiiiiiiiiiiiiit. i think it is the same result if you yell through sign language. yep. no, i don’t know the sign for the f-bomb. i bet it kicks ass though.

great question can you help someone

how you doin

great question if a woman is taller than her man does he have to do all the cleaning

shorter people work harder.

Great question are people better behaved at expensive stores

when they let me in i’ll be sure to tell you

great question can i trade a large baby for two small babies and a baby to be named later

not like we don’t choose our adoptees. that’s different. no god damnit, its the same. you don’t adopt the runt. we fool the sun but under the moon its the awful tune of humanity run amok.

great question do i need sympathy because my dad could not say what he wanted

no. it doesn’t move the needle at this point. and, people who give sympathy want that thank you more than you think. and if you don’t give it then they’ve had it. superficial at best. sonsabitches. we know. we damn well do.

great question am i close to death

hope is starting to look small in the face of it. got some financial problems. i wrote good bye letters in my head last night. cried like a baby. had the criffles. and am living in fear. gotta be closer than farther. why don’t i get help? funny thing, nothing has changed yet cept for the invasion of anxiety ants on my cranial picnic. there’s that.

great question should a person carry after dukey cologne

be nice. person walks in elevator, has that after duke smell, you have a window to ask how many flushes. then we solve the planet. go earth.

great question should coors sell milk

banquet milk. have it your way

great question how long have i been on a diet

1997. i should be pretty good by now. thanks. support helps. veteran dieter. feels good. looks the same if you are into that visual thing.

great question would i allow the family to reform upon my success

i don’t know. i think everything is pretty much settled. scabs are pretty well fixed on.

great question when do you give it your all

when you cough at doctor rosen’s room. MOOOOOOOON quiver.

great question what would america have been without the grateful dead

employed.

great question how many things can have strawberry cheescake in it

i think everything but headcheese.

great question could leggins have stopped the tank in tia ena min square

an odd place to start a long conversation

great question is it not true we only want to live, maybe, ten days a year

I think that is fair. unless you are a happy person and in that case go fuck yourself. we, are attending to the lethargy of the soul.

great question if foodtv made toilet paper would i buy some

maybe warm it in the microwave. so, no secrets yet. huh. nice knowing you.

great question am i sad

hopeless

great question should you be able to bet a kid on a game

i know. i know. but, think of it this way. you get good odds. start the night wit one kid. come home wit ten. not bad. after you get good at being a parent you are down to two, tree. not bad at all. the others? there has to be a support group for bastards.

great question what’s the worst thing you can say to someone at the worst time

get over it.

great question do they have shake n bake for cannibals

you don’t know. what store would carry that potion, i don’t know. that would be the second problem. third would be the gimp jockeying the register.

great question would i let someone sponsor my words

charmin. outdoor charmin. none of that indoor stuff. go earth.

great question do i smell better when i am happy

it is odd that the public has better track of your nasal fog than you do.

great question do yoga teachers feel they are big kitties.

that purrrrrrr you hear as dog is near……har har har.

great question if you hop over to the other gender, do your farts smell the same

what would be the point of hoisting that flag were you not able to coerce a fart previously unreachable. maybe i got it all wrong. maybe there is a bigger reason.

great question would i like a motorcade

i would until they all become electric. to what end for what means.

great question if the world is saved does everyone become american

i think so.

great question is the fight to save the earth of ours just a cover for humping

we ignore the truth because we like to let the poor wiggle the waggle while we laugh and play scrabble.

great question is it conformity to put paper in the wall

i think all acts separate from giving love are meaningless in truth. we create noise in the appearance of belief.

great question am i the luckiest person

when i look i am

great question is confidence cheap

when you struggle with it it isn’t. here i reside. in the face of the infinite pests i do not belong. they think what they do not know.

great question are we courageous when we are pretty

that is when you let out a cheek quake.

great question is it true, the more money you have, the less clothes you wear

it’s true. what about a fat rich person: toga!

great question do black people do more for memory of the dead than anyone else

jews. good or bad, there is longevity in the sad

great question can mgmt only understand mgmt

the blessing and the curse. the horror of impersonal infliction.

great question why is my cat’s breathing relaxing

she trusts me. might be eleven pounds, but, to see the little chest rise and fall lets me know my chest should rise and fall too.

great question would transformers get their own bathroom

two. one for each transformation. who knew bathrooms could get complicated. it’s tough enough with public bathrooms and the vortex of toxins and now, now you need to study your crotch. sheeeesh.

great question if i was on discovery, would i not lose one to a shark to make the viewers happy

be nice. show that you care so we can see that you have loved.

great question is attempting suicide the same as giving up

yes. less we confuse bravery with taking off our mortal shoes

great question do you lose your gender as you age

you do unless you have money.

great question when did woman realize they had it so bad

when they met another woman.

great question do i feel bad for all the times my dad felt bad

unless we talked it’s all make believe and we didn’t so i don’t.

great question how many guns do you need so you can be persuasive

odds are you’ll need some good ass caliber. then, then the automatic mother fuckers. the more guns you have the more people can understand you.

great question is it too much to comprehend that more often i act like my brother.

it is an odd cuff.

great question does believing make you less lonely

no. we all have different cloaks but the same lonely.

great question if the country slept better, would we recognize ourself in the new days light

to spoon or not to spoon. that is the question, the favor, the ask, of your country at this time in our developing world.

great question why don’t nike make high heels

They don’t make cowboy boots….har, har, har.

great question do you have to eat to celebrate death

depends whose dying. jebus dies we get fertile rabbits. not bad. maybe it says the wrong thing. jebus returns we eat prime rib. tell ya, the growth spirt he has in that one year is phenomenal.

great question what age do you hide from attention

fat. shame is now underneath that drapery called skin. and when the mirror reminds you of this sin all you can do is disappear a little more in the world gone glam.

great question do i think special needs kids get more love

sadly, we probably don’t mean it. nope. god damn welcome to holland.

great question do most chefs look like their food

look at swedish chef. course, if i had a hand up my arse i would look like food too. colon parade not counting. i did the box. three years and no hands in the nookie jar.

great question is it true lotion is a marinade

if they knew, if they cared. another laddle on me person sire…..yes, and then five minutes later five pounds more. i will be moist in my horror.

great question what is the rest of the space for in the copier

ass

great question would jebus use a bidet

can’t. can’t have it. does this change things, is our world a little more lonely because of this? maybe. it’s what you get for being special. the highs are high and the lows or defeating.

great question if you sell the clover of another persons hard damn effort, are you a preacher

tell you what has been told and act as though it is new. shiiiiiiiiiiiit.

great question can you noodle a ballerina

i do think it would make for a subpar noodle. plus, all those tab cans. you don’t think but you know. yeah, fist bump.

great question which ocean has the most calories

billy. just fucking with ya. one on the left. how would i know? most affordable one.

great question am i surprised they have not turned anything out after organic

i am. come on. do more for our dollar than come at our warchest with minny grabs of greed. we are waiting for the worst of your kind to be the best of all time.

great question do they think we are going to return the earth brand new

the illusion is strong in them. we will have a better planet. hate ourselves. loath the skin of our kind. bemoan the lot of masses. but damnit, it looks like the weather will return to normal. problem solved.

great question is boarding school the same as abortion

for eighteen years.

great question why do we believe in facts

we can hide our true intentions. it’s all tetris in the end.

great question what is a good marriage

laughter. sincerity. respect. listen. black underwear.

great question does a suicide attempt make everyone else a counselor

it seems sorrow opens words better left unsaid.

great question how do you believe your shit

you can’t handle your loneliness. yes, then the words are written in stone and your favor is sinkin like a stone.

great question would i light a coma on fire

probably not, but probably anyway. you to. thought so.

great question are we guilty of life by association

we are all innocence. we are all guilty. we are all dying. we are all the same. just busy trying.

great question would i be ia at cinnabon

damn right. pay me in flavor and call it a day. the frosting would be worth the roll.

great question what dog has a nose pierced

we are funny. it would hurt the dog. and you? i don’t know. it looks cool. how? it just does. i find it best not to give people reason to put metal in my head. but, then again, i’m not a golfer. obviously. obviously.

great question what happens when they run out of surface to tat

you get fatter. you get tatter. you damn well eat a lot of batter. hoo-rah!

great question are midwest women less feminist than the coastal women

midwest women have full lives. work. family. leggings. you don’t have time to throw the whoa around when you have a full boat of life in your lap.

great question if you are a stage actor can we understand the depth of you

as confidence is brash, we shall not kiss your ass

great question when i drink in my dreams is that as good as doing awake

a odd jolt. if i really wanted to die i would get drunk. at this point it doesn’t mean much. do i wish it did? can’t control it. things happen that create meaning far be it from me to know which one will hit me the hardest. they come an go.

great question does it count if you are terminal and go to someone’s funeral

funerals don’t have a double header. be nice. kind of like posing for prom pictures. change the photos, bring in the family. bingo bongo boingo.

great question why do people need to know what you have gone through

so your coming short doesn’t mean your coming up lonely as well.

great question greatest thing you can do to a kid

not have em. all right! sonsabitches. think of all the education you will save for the next kid to never be cool.

great question isn’t it great you are never more than one mile from a muffin

six degrees of poppyseed.

great question if we circumcized a pig would that make it kosher

at joshua tree, no one around but for world’s greatest blt ever, and a snipped stanley, how long would that samich be lonely…..never more, never more, never more.

great question would wonder woman host a book club

be redundant, most book clubs are. we bond. so says the chairs.

great question do you include a fat person in a storm shelter

heh, heh, heh

great question is the love you never gave the poison as you age

i believe so.

great question what do you tell kids at graduation

you don’t know and damned if you think you do

great question do we presume transformers are the item for the transforming population

i reason that. a prime piece indeed.

great question why do women try and be the best man

swing low, sweet chariot, coming for take me home, swing low, sweet willy, coming for to take you home.

great question what deodorant do you use for the new born

i was thinking a nice brine. memories. the stuff of crimes.

great question what can’t a head nod concur to

alimony

Great question where hasn’t that thermometer been

yeeesh. cold too god damnit.

great question you took away my diet coke in the hospital, how dare you

i was just doing my job. oh, no, you were doing much more than that. take me kid but do not, do not, take my diet coke. shit. we tough. we tough.

and leave the canoli. sombitch.

great question women are in better shape then men so when the call comes the armada can form

yes and then as the battles go forth, the victors will look the same as the victims.

great question the purest form of love

wagging tail

great question would i worry if the fellers at the crematorium were enthusiastic

no. it’s a thankless task. i think if they were cooking stew with stew maybe.

great question could donny benet be jebus

if anyone would be could it would be could

great question should i have been embarassed when they cleaned me at the hospital

sometimes we all need a little help

great question are handicapp people royalty in hospital country

keeps the green flowing faster the sunday afternoon bottle of bourbon

great question what is the embargo with the ice chips in box heavens

like a d -. not something they like to give out. tell you. that.

great question what should they do with the amputated bone

dog does drugs for guvmint, let em chew on hale fellow well met.

great question what will the chaplin heal

the questions on that contraption for a remote

great question if you climb a mountain are we happy that you have spent so much time away from us

we happy. jules says so

great question will i feel the same about my mom as my dad

the gratitude and admiration overtake anything else

great question why didn’t they pick my nose at the hospital

they didn’t want to boogie. shit never gets old.

great question if your teacher at abortion school tells you, in a quiet meeting, i think you could put up some big numbers, what do you say

hey teach, i’m just gonna barrel up and put some good swings together. see if i have enough bad speed. bat speed. jebus had good wood.

great question how many people are named sean in england

you have trophy’s in your realm. and the names. oh, darling. king. queen. prince. ha! department of war. moohoo ha ha ha. we keep the world in balance. you care about one lump or two. so does man.

great question was the ruler the pre nanner pipe

i think when you see the side by side of a nun and ga-lou-lee, you see destiny.

great question can you spend too much time with your kids

no. in the end they’ll be thinking that about you.

great question how important are feet to a woman

billions on them dawgs. and you want to be taken seriously. are we the lamb for the slaughter or the gifted ones with the laughter.

great question is it loneliness before bitterness

always. cept for that knight with the grail. i wouldn’t treat his schizophrenia. sometimes its a nice break in the day.

great question would the other conjoined have to be the vp

whaddya do about the biffy? oooph. it’s why i’m on the sidelines. too many questions. too many secrets.

great question if hitler had lamb chops would it have mattered

don’t know. so many things went right to be that wrong. if he had lamb chops maybe he’s a drunk. who knows. the little mustache. and thus no mustache will ever be innocent.

great question why do we all want to talk about the things we don’t want to talk about

we surround our feelings with shell of fear. course, today we have the law of sensitivity and thus, thus always afraid of the gust of despair

great question is the cost of a woman a diamond

good woman. thur-ah.

great question how many toes would i like to have in the summer

to be honest, i’d like one toe. take a look at thumper, isn’t it grand? look at it, it’s lookin at you right now. see it wrangle with the beach works of weekend art. thumper gonna have a good summer.

great question is love a muscle

begs the real question: can one person have more love than another? i don’t know. i think it comes down to given ourselves enough chances to express the love. and a fine day to you too.

great question is global warming tinder for vegans

get horny saving a planet.

great question if you pronounce a mexican’s name correctly do you speak spanish

it’s a simple get.

great question are awkward moments as good as getting over food poisoning

i think their better because you can’t believe you got hung up something so simply silly

great question do i think media loved the riots

it is hard to think that they did not. still afraid they are. could be the homogeny of thought determined to push. maybe they just gave in to the money bubbling up from the plaster of disaster.

great question is trumps intelligence easily dismissed?

no one is 100%. given, hard not to fist bump it.

great question could my dad have saved the family in his dying days

tough stuff. seems impossible. but, if he spoke from the heart i know we all would have been moved closer together.

great question in the theoretical removal of gum chewers, does age matter

no. at my age i feel okay. thanks.

great question what’s with you and the hand sanitzer soup all over those digits

any lotion fiend will tell you a little goes a long way. yeah. like are patience as you leave a trail of hand hootch on the floor.

great question what is the secret to making other people feel good

make them the hero’s in their mind. what if they are in a coma? then you have a day off. you deserve it.

great question person doesn’t talk to me, do i respect them more or less

i respect people if they don’t like me. i know the feeling.

great question if death came with a brochure, could i sell it better

bro-chur. it’s all in the delivery.

great question do you feel vindicated if you can’t be seen as a he or a her

we need to let people enjoy themselves under the sun. be it one or two or three, let em be.

great question would a orphan be safe to sell cookies to a planned parenthood clinic

i think it would get awkward, especially when they show joey the VIP room

Great question person is in hospital fighting for their life, how long do you have to stay in a visit

til they get food so you can eat it because they just don’t have the energy. if the price is right the food is good.

great question would i let aliens watch ABC evening news

no. why show them the evil we have wrought with nice clothes bought. shiiiiit. show them the door in the floor before the devil in makeup. you wrought to make the aged afraid and think not of it.

great question what sport can minnesota win at in my lifetime

taxation

great question would i be the ed snowden of cinnabon

i am a patriot and a customer for which i would never waiver.

great question who do people think cares

the youth. fools. soon they will see what we know and then cry like they are meant to do…..moo-hoo, moo-hoo ha ha ha ha!!!

great question when do you stop trying for a life

sounds like inheritance. feels like inheritance. could be inheritance.

great question are sports the best way to be for something but not for anything

heh, heh, heh, how you doin

great question what would be the appropriate response to the person who has a bad fucking tat

i like you betty.

great question do you ever rat out a coworker

it is the last thing you do but in this chomp chomp world you have to be there for one. still. unless it’s life or death embrace grace.

great question have cow farts evolved

just the amount of time people without real work have. shiiiiiit. but the planet. just saying, if your argument comes down to farts we are fucked. so, come back with something greater than the back end of a milk faucet.

great question would, could, cartel’s get the pharmacy line moving faster

true. put an end to granny’s half hour seminar into her life.

great question how do you know you won’t kill yourself

i don’t know. i don’t.

great question would i like to mow the grass at the augusta

neked. i think it would bring the experience to a new level.

great question would it be offensive to bring a newborn to a wake

letting the little one suckle might not go over. we have a right damnit. and there is decorum honey. yeah. we hit back hard! who are they when we are us.

great qeustion why can’t being good at something just be called being good at something

the leaches of lethargy latch on like lovers lost

great question am i my own man

probably not.

great question why don’t they show the lazy persons kitchen when they try to get us keyed up about chemicals

they know that five year chili deposit on the half cracked plate ain’t comin off with endearing spray of conceivable chemical creation.

great question what age is it the man’s fault

start wearing suits. no good sonsabitches. right guard must be wee bit chilly this morning. twas. depends where you use it.

great question how soon til we sell recycled food

and baby food is whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? ol’ sweetie pie tain’t scarfing on jar of love.

great question do you tell someone you knew them as a baby

no. intent is to connect. reality: run to the hills an see ma barker.

great question what’s worse than not knowing the answer to the question you are about to ask

the foolish interest the others realize.

great question are we lucky that cows are waterproof

get creative, you can find gratitude fun. number one is this is going to end at some point. heh, heh, heh. funny. i like your clever.

great question when i was hit in the head with a baseball bat as a kid were concussions invented

no. art of study had yet to find the fields of green. you probably deserved what you got. pick on me. that’s my yob. shiiiiiiiiit.

great question if you don’t look forward to giving will you always flunk aging

i hope so cause that my plan on the tracks to nowhere land.

great question are we lucky chickens are horny

chickens, writers, what are we but the example of appetite.

great question how do i stay positive

i think in times like these i turn the controls over. i always think i can do it but in the end i need that carpet ride i call faith.

great question can a adult use the word cozy

with a fucking cozy as shit. yeah, it works.

great question are my johnnies ever going to reward me for my loyalty

Fooooool am i. maybe focus on the winning and let the rest pass by. story is all the same. gonna be this year. gonna do it. have the team. pa-phoooey. never does it come together. talk flies far ahead while the rest remains instead.

great question what can’t you put in your ear to get the wax out

activists.

great question is this something more than free

annoying.

great question would auto correct correct jebus

the nerve of technology. in the end we will go blind with our infamy.

great question what is the life expectancy of a idiot

heh, heh, heh.

great question do we all secretly wish cosell’s hair was from morty’s

we do. donald would have done well in that crowd. me? probably use too many aprons.

great question what if you do yoga backwards

ooooph. that’s the goods. start with the nap then dog gone it.

great question what is the amount you can earn before you have to pay the size of tax to pay for the people who have decided not to earn as much as you

no, not everything is about teachers. jerks. three months off an you are an adult. to what end. ooooh, a little burn there isn’t it, yes, take that you union hiding no good sonsabitches. we dedicate our lives. one of those. always has to be one of those.

great question would i let my cat caddie for me at the augusta so she could use clumping sand traps

i’d like to see the attitude break off from the norm of impolite.

great question isn’t it funny that you have to pay for quality toilet paper

so sad but so funny. hold my arse hostage will you? never! you will spin for this i shit you not.

great question where does unused cologne go

countries that don’t read vanity fair……..in a big country. ha! it’s the damn video. ooooh, four wheeling makes the music better. then the midwest would rise, fair midwest, arise.

great question why don’t we blame the earth in peril on immigrants.

cause they haven’t earned enough to ruin the planet. very true. someday i’ll earn enough. then we’ll party. talk about a pawty.

great question who owns jebus

christopher cross

great question would aliens have laundry

i tell you, it would be nice to see a gort sticking in the tighty whites to a coin hungry apparatus.

great question how do you sell a laptop to a person with no legs

you don’t. tablet. gotta have a tablet. swipe this technology. we know. you see. we are. legendary

great question should apple, if, apple was worth its greed, have christopher walken as siri

we are not far apart, just a ways away

great question do you get loved more if you have better hygene

funeral homes don’t like it, but a little cologne on the dead. ooooph, that is the thing.

great question do i think i would be the first person to have a pee trough at home

why? if i have that in my home i would know life is good. go down in pee trough lore. he was a son of a bitch, but damnit, a fine trough, a damn fine trough.

great question would i like to see body bags at ski hills

skiing. using nature to make a profit. pay to risk your life. that is why we visit immitation boston. ha!

great question can you judge a business by the food in the employee fridge

i think you must. put boss in fridge. shit yeah. give them a timeout. all right. we don’t need to be managed. we are the stars unglorified by the lack of numbers next to our labor’s baby.

great question do i feel stupid asking bad questions

there’s that.

great question could all of this be better

we are a vicious lot. everyone gets carved to shred of what others only hope they could be. someday me. someday you. but in the truth, that is us.

great question i see the moon in the morning leading me to work and soon enough the sun drops in to let me know there are planets not just plants in this crazy life of ours. all of which makes me wonder: did brady fumble

he did. we saw. they know. it is. it was.

great question should kevin bacon be allowed into a synogogue

we invert it. make everything a place of worship and be lucky enough to have places where nothing is thought and even less is said…..their called bars fool. i am corrected.

great question should we be happy there was a ethos

now yur playing. poor donny. marmot’s okay. it really took to water. how how how!!!

great question have i had a defining moment

I ‘ve watched a lot of kevin costner movies……i don’t know….haven’t achieved anything yet. still alive. that is probably best i got

great question what is the rule on kissing relatives

okay to kiss four legs. if i had four legs i could get affection. the crux of us. shiiiit.

great question should nudists pay more for tats

buckets full of money. you see it all the time. dumbass, you would have to be at the colony? don’t ruin my bliss. your a fraud. that is how we are until we are in our dreams.

great question why do i think it is fun to joke about babies

only because when we say fuck it, we always point to youth as our hope. and there is no hope in youth for they have not been witnessed to the titantic that is age.

great question number of times you use the egg after you splurge

jerk. we earn big bucks so we have a right to have big buck toys. get a real job. valid. i am getting it in the goods. oooph.

great question what do engineers do

occupy various administrative buildings

great question can we use lime away to get rid of key lime pie

that or the tractor beam called mouth. eating for unit, core, god, country.

great question is vitamix the new woodchipper

heh, heh, heh. why do you have to make something so strong. don’t say its the pursuit of excellence. jet engines don’t have the torque. you want a finger, toe, a piece of me. you got it. wyatt earp took over.

great question would our habits change if we paid in kittens

suddenly you do go with the cheap toilet paper.

great question doesn’t everyone want to be sexy at some point

deep down we want to be eye candy. i think i am eye ruffage.

great question unlimited cold diet coke for life, or no more bike lanes

i love us. i will find my diet coke somewhere but until then, let us come together and rid the roads of the toads come our souls.

great question is it wrong i’ve hugged animals more than humans in my life

no. can’t believe i am alone. sure they might be stuffed but so am i.

great question what could the best thing to be grateful for

prayer

great question was twister the precursor to yoga

gotta give credit where credit is due.

great question because my mom bought my funeral all ready, do i sleep better

it is odd to know the love parade is taken care of.

great question if all sunrises are fascinating why can’t the people who want to protect them be

in theory, that they’ve made it this far in life is fascinating. we are much more than you give us credit for. i hope so, i hope so.

great question how soon til the sex industry takes advantage of self driving cars

tesla. meow meow putty tat.

great question if people spoke less could we have that time to save the earth

theoretically. but you save the earth by talking about it. no, you save it by filling urns with grandparents. then we can go down the coffee avenue at wholesome brigade emporium and afford something with more than a little chickery.

great question do i respect people who are too good for me

makes me feel better. laugh at the angels we have heard on high. heh, heh, heh. you are such a nice sprig of humanity. you, you with your uknown abnormalities.

great question are all modern day newspapers innocent

of course they are. when you all jumped onto the floyd bandwagon you all lost your credibility. we have a duty to the reader. Bah! too common is your refrain. hiding in the money of the now.

great question if all gum chewers died would we need multiple funerals

don’t know that we have to get that classy.

great question is there more pressure on bald women to look good for their spouse then the other way around

without a doubt. it’s why i recomend all bald women became man. yep. yur welcome.

great question difference between sunglasses and fuck off

very little. saving my eyes. well, that is well an good cause you have just saved me time. now i can recycle even more. go earth go.

great question my bike has a motor does that make me special

don’t worry, you are the farthest thing away from special. there you go. night night.

great question i am taking a aarp drivers course so i can be a better driver, isn’t that good

sure, you waste your time away from the road makes the rest of us safer.

great question should stupidity be entertaining

probably not but by god i love that it is.

great question guns are bad right

it is the cultural shart. no matter how you spin it, it’s a problem.

great question how far can you go by being pleasant

i think little debbie is pleasant.

great question should you be allowed to buy a car at eighty years old

hot dog and a hummer.

great question who is my role model

my dreams

great question if the world sucks right now, but, we have the ivy league, does that show that they are not the answer to humanity

there it is. try and separate yourself. no! not in this land. to our enemies we are one. to each other we must be one. the end will bring us together. let the journey be the evidence to that.

great question legalize sex or drugs

it would make sundown a little more peculiar.

great question is boarding school good parenting

the best. responsible but not. fabulous. i would put my kids to work on the back forty. have em put in a good, thurah, sewer system. maybe shingle. let there be evidence that something is afoot with the customers of my heart.

great question if you are off the grid what do you talk about

i noticed some ferns in your trousers. be more careful. think of the ferns honey, think of the ferns.

great question should tall women change the lightbulbs for free of short women

of course. i would expect nothing less. total teamwork. that is what will defeat the men. and then we can rest and fart. oh how we want to rest…….and fart. use febreze for women by women.

great question why don’t we call the earth’s bluff

the temperature is going up. glaciers are melting. the coral reef man. coral. fucking. reef. oh, well then, let me stick my head up my ass. it’s big enough. so, you are there. not funny. you’re right. north of hilarious. south of neanderthal

great question a shark eats the shark that is eating your kid, is that two sharks eating your kid

see, i’m a giver, so i say that is two sharks.

great question what story do we need to hear more of in our news

the first transport of new underwear is away

great question why are we surprised when stupid people say stupid things

…….just checking. almost had ya. how we doin…..all right.

great question would i noodle with a baby

yes, but i would have the rope tied pretty tight around the baby you don’t won’t to lose that cat fish. be a shame. cat fish can feed a party. nice eating. what about the baby? baby, baby get up, get up, get out of here.

great question do i think if i get rich i would be able to save my family

i think because we are all radioactive the today is the way for all future morrows.

great question what is the only nice thing you can say to someone at work

have you tried the hot pockets

great question do you hire the person with the bad breath or the farter

febreze, what do you have to say. Thank you o wise one. welcome, tell it to me straight. We can handle the summer wind, its the noreaster we cannot. thank you febreze. Don’t mention it, and lay of the tacos. fuck tony.

great question what age are you allowed to make coworkers miserable

i would say thirty five. seems like a good year to transition into being an ass. i would never. less my standing as a innocent man would be challenged.

great question should you let the inmate have a funeral outside of the prison

in theory no. we are only sisters and brothers so i say yes. let there be sunlight at the end of the storm.

great question is disrespect the worst thing a younger person can do to a older person

such is the pitfall of youth.

great question do you date and eat spicy food

i think you do wait til the first dance to show them the thunder you can make in your pants.

great question when can you give the look of being bad parent to a fellow servant of the small n soggy.

feed your kid pirate’s booty, what the fuck are you thinking? feed them hormel chili. shiiiiiiiiit…..

great question is being friendly the same as a person liking you

in the midwest. we have ways keeping selves busy before the song of sorry we call winter arrives in full.

great question if new fashion was no fashion at all, would i be a model

i would be the greatest thing ever sloth a runway. pizza in the left, cinnabon in the right and ketchup all over the rest of me. be glorious. just like red.

great question would woman invent a third gender to give them extra support in the trench’s of x vs o

no, gymnastics does not count. ballet? no. onesies. maybe the Welsh and Hungarians.

great question could we just tax the shit out of abortions

What about the poor women. maybe they don’t let rin tin tin in.

great question still no time travel?

As far as i know, no. would i change anything? buckner. silly question. shiiiiiiiiit.

great question when can you disown your kid

tat. i didn’t raise no billboard. outta here!!!

great question will the end of sports be from the top down or the bottom up

bottom. owners have money. pillage of the poor. some damn fine greed. never enough. make more than some towns will ever have but that is not enough. less i give you my seed.

great question when will we charge for cold air

when i am the emcee for the cold cruel caustic creation called global coooooooling.

great question if people don’t bring violins to orchestra concerts why do people bring their voices to rock concerts.

piss me off. sonsabitches.

great question do i think jackie said enough in the way she dressed

yet we say beauty is on the inside. ha! the envy is still hanging around. and in the end, you sleep with your skivies. i have silk pajamas. don’t we know it. i sleep great. i bet you do, i bet you do. i wake up fresh. i wake up with a new constitution.

great question if, if, brian den a hee, in rambo, said to rambo, “why say no when it feels so good to say yes?”

on to something. we could very well have saved six, ten, twenty movies. damn us to hell where we’ll have to watch them again. chuck is in heaven. shit, chuck would be jebus but he’s already chuck.

great question do you have to reinvent yourself to lose weight

yes. i think. letting go. overused sentiment that lies deep within the art of growth.

great question why blame the theranos girl

because she was wreckable.

great question do homeless people have the record for not changing clothes

nudists.

great question should you be allowed to give a good kid a gun

yes. let them conceal and carry and serve mass. be the last time father grabs some ass.

great question why is it, that it seems, of course, that vegans eats with purpose and the rest of us don’t

cause everything means more to them because they are alive and dare to feel……hope they dare to wipe too. ha! score one for us. we eat witout reservation.

great question if, if you are in the ocean and have your baby on your head and a shark jumps out of the water, takes a right turn, snatch’s the kid, elevates, and you can take a picture or save the kid, what do you do

there is no question. shiiiiiiiit. we funny. we funny. snatch a kid from poverty to enjoy in your new found bounty.

great question  do you sneak your kid into the family that has better parents than you could be

i think it should be okay. likely they are better people too. they’ll enjoy the flattery. most people do.

great question gilmore girls vs golden girls

i do think the winner would be wit.

great question when do you change

when the hurt is coming and you ain’t a ready, you runaway run.

great question if the people on the plane in alive were pickleball players would they have gnawed on biff’s beef

no. that’s okay. die by being polite. live by slaughtering your appetite.

great question would i feel different for my dad if he stood up for me

there are a lotta sails for that boat. best keep it ashore.

great question does tay know what she wants

global thermal nuclear war

great question a person is well read, what does that even mean

they are smarter than themselves.

great question since supermodels are handicapped by their beauty, are there other senses higher

sometimes they can see more. all the food they cannot eat. don’t. you are thin but not for glory of the body, instead for the depth of pockets. shiiiiiit.

great question if person is able to get a echo off of a fart in the grand canyon, should they revive 3-2-1 contact and have them as the first host

yes. by god almighty yes. what you have done is the stuff of dreams. do not wish it away.

great question do you pick on the people who want to be picked on

brine em. that is so sick. and that perfume you are wearing, is that not FDA approved sweet chops. heh, heh, heh.

great question should vegans wear a orange vest all the time

you damn well know they want to be seen as veggie clean.

great question best way to ruin a good band

short lead singer

great question if you are past four kids who do you think you are helping

we’ve always wanted a big family. funny, we don’t. snip. snap it. just don’t have it. go earth.

great question if you live on a houseboat do you not fish within fity feet of the boat

i would second that. you don’t want the first thing you catch to be last night’s supper. course you houseboat people are a thing unto yourselves. we are adventure seekers. i’ll tell quint.

great question can you tell the spouse from their spouse

i think you can. does it matter, no. a reader’s digest thought if i ever were to have one. which i hope i don’t. or get in one of those parade magazine earnings issue. how much you make parade? You, gee, elle, why. heh, heh, heh.

great question if people don’t like you does that mean you are doing something right

yes. cept if you are a baby. everybody loves babies. cause babies are money. so money. do they even know? no. ha. money. fools.

great question do i think the people around prince were all enablers

at some point you have to risk the relationship to love the person.

great question what is a happy thought

freckles are not poop

great question should you travel with a license once you are terminal that allows you to say anything

give them that much. we know they are suffering. if we can help that who are we to say no.

great question is yoga feminism

ours. stay away. helps us deal with the pain of man. so does hootch but we share.

great question what is the point of tanning

to get off white.

great question should we focus on winning wars instead of how we win

I think so. after a while people will see our soft side grow as a means to achieve a nuetrality that never exists.

great question if people talked less would we love them more

that is sexist. women are better than men cause we talk. we are better than you because we earn more. how dare you. no! how dare you mr president.

great question is it true that women can go bald from not leaving the toilet seat up

shame. damn shame. lost a lot of good women out there. it’s always a joke with you men, isn’t it? just trying to help ma’am. i don’t need your help. you need something all right. jer-no, i wont do you the favor. it’s okay, i have pringles. extra pringly mind you. shop around. find the low birth weight.

great question do superhero’s wear deodorant

no but they should. they do wear thin. badah bing badah zoom!

great question why don’t men clean toilets

so there can be the worst toilet in all of scotland…..and so we can understand the vermin that patrol sugar huts leaking mobile milk we call fuel.

great question are terminals more attractive than non terminals

you are on to this solider of fortune. we are all terminal. yabba dabba true.

great question is a dead fetus better than a dying senior

less time consuming. which is nice. and no funeral. not bad. leave weekend free gotta love that. not paying for disgruntled kitchen workers to slop out second hand gruel to those just coming to see whose gotten fat.

great question does your ethnicity mean anything

no. it just means you wanted to be treated special with out treating others with respect. no. yes. everybody hangs it out there like it matters when in the end of the fucking day it matters nothing. respect is a even street between two dead ends.

great question would i want frank caliendo as my therapist

in a heartbeat. i think comedians could make good therapists. i do. just like contortionists could make good yoga teachers. i do like the quaint theory of rest at the end. i snore.

great question what does good therapy look like

woof woof, meow meow.

great question should there be a smithsonian for drugs

oh honey, look, the doobie was invented in biblical times. mathew, mark, luke, john, willie. that’s a peach hun…….weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

great question if the most attractive women became president would we feel better about our country

than she’ll become a he and the country will froth over. and the men will dance in the puddle of women’s tears ever to be deep and always to be plenty

great question would i noodle if the catfish was a cinnabon

up to my neck. be a helluva nibble. just niblin.

great question what is the power of judaism

their leader is not named ron.

great question could we have more wild turkey’s and less speed bumps

go earth

great question do the stones sleep in a humidor

i think they probably have for-mel-da-hyde in the veins. in the veins.

great question what if, if, the earth is fine.

no. its not. don’t you read? but whose writing. you are too lazy to deserve earth. hug? fuck off. bear hug? die.

great question would i be upset if i ask how you are doing, when we meet, and you say good

i would presume something zesty. very enterprising.

great question why are we not giving more options to save the earth

every ten pounds of compost get a lollipop, lollipop, oh lolly, lolly, lollipop.

great question how many sniffs are you allowed in public

if you are outside and it is a windy day, multiple. if you are indoors, one. what happens then? a loud buzz by a sharp pain quickly masked by a river of red honesty.

great question what happens if you eat a frito lay than start eating a cheeto

houston, we have the munchies.

great question do you bring flowers to your favorite abortion doctor

i like to give them a fresh, crisp pair of shark gloves. don’t know if they laugh at the slaughterhouse. might be wrong. when the door to hell is open i would hope the breeze of laughter is aplenty.

great question has kitty cat only proven the allure of cold hard cash

i believe that is the primal scream………….money, money, money, maaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayy

great question canoe vs kayak

torpedo

great question do you give your kids up for adoption before you climb everest.

make them floor rats climb it. make them show you they deserve to be loved. we’re just kids. and we’re not buying it. you heal fast. might not bounce. rocks won’t cry.

great question is florida vegas for seniors

i think so. who knew heat was bug light of the aged.

great question if i made hand sanitizer would i feel like a failure if i could not get that last percent

we get to 100, maybe we can save the earth from the tumble. maybe we’ll tumble together. not bad. enjoy the last taste of gravity. sport.

great question is it okay to miss a parent that you did not like

it’s okay. part of the deal.

great question is westminster the oscars for dogs

don’t remember the squeeze-a-rooony at the oscars. then again, i don’t get around much anymore.

great question do yoga teachers like fruit rollups

yoga mats for the hands. then no clean just chew it right into savasana. mmmph. so nice. like fresh cakes.

great question should dateline be part of homeland security

I think it already is. dateline. no humor but humor all the same.

great question was ansel adams color blind

hard pressed to say he wasn’t.

great question should vegans give blood

their innocence is enough

great question what could they deep fry at the state fair

leggings. yes. and the crowd would go wild and in the wild they would return, frothing if not storming into the next night a little less but a whole lot more.

great question what does close get us in saving the earth

warmest personal regards.

great question does talking points come with the peleton

why make fun of my success? because its there god damnit!

great question does it feel good knowing i am closer to death today than i was yesterday

It does. did it together. fist bump that.

great question are coffee shops bathrooms of our souls

sounded catchy.

great question if women could talk in their sleep to each other would they

that is why they have it down: women, unit, core, god, country.

great question should they have a special military unit of funny people

if they brought out bob hope for the troops i know we can do a little better for the front line. we think they don’t matter until we scream to go get em boys an girls while we read the beach givings an sip the fine whine of peace time.

great question do people with dogs drive more than people with cats

they can afford a car.

great question does it take courage to be intense

i think when you are backed up it takes a lot of courage. and it does get intense. and why you have incense.

great question should the blind work at wax shops

you tell me who loses and i’ll show you who wins.

great question what is wrong about being progressive

it’s the underlying sensitivity that comes across as desperation.

great question are you sassy if you eat bugs

Phil you in later.

great question why is the earth more important than the souls of the savages who live on it

love than earth. if there is no planet? there can be no eeeeeeeevil.

great question would jebus split jacks

just adams.

great question should jimmy kimmel be fired

he’s no dick cavett

great question why do thin people think they can save fat people

skidmarks.

great question should you have to wash your hands after you fart

i don’t know why, but yes.

great question what would happen if we had to choose between handicap parking and bike lanes

biking is bliss. we’ll be sure not to miss.

great question are campgrounds the same as bike lanes

no. campgrounds are classier. don’t flip you the bird. know its the word.

great question would i like to see a soft serve ice cream maker in my dreams.

there can’t be a heaven. impossible for it to work. eventually, we’d want to die. in the end we all get tired.

great question if it is twins on up, do you charge for two aborts

tough. interesting question. i think, if, if they are conjoined it is one. I’m a giver.

great question how many diseases should you have on file to get a sick day

i like mental health day til you realize the true sickness is in having a good mental health day.

great question do most tough men judge other men by how rich they think the other man is

man boobs.

great question would the worst thing for humanity be if we found out there is no after

it could be the ticket. be nice to know guilt and shame won’t carry over and then we’ll get some honest words from the biblical herds.

great question would i drink on my last day on earth?

no. i would be happy to go as is. when i go, you drink for the show. shoW shOW sHOW SHOW

great question which is better thank you or your welcome

thank you for getting rid of all the bike lanes in north america. your welcome. i think thank you is better. manners. all comes down to manners. i think that explains the knee dweller in house of white come through.

great question shouldn’t the world be a better place by now

you would think. all the religion and education. how are we getting it so wrong. communication. it’s a motherfucker.

great question do bike jokes get old

it’s the humor of it all. biking is going to save us. fuck it. let’s just walk and save some fucking more. fuck that, let’s crawl. fuck that. lets not have kids. problem solved.

great question if you work at sotheby’s how many showers do you take a day

probably have shower assistant. rich people. shiiiiiiiiit.

i may be bitter but i am right in there with ya.

great question would aliens go with comcast

tough. like to see comcast collect past due from sprotens. come visit us on planet gromulus and get the blood money. it is nice to know where there is a collection of people i never want to talk to.

great question if you wear a lanyard how close are you to being in mensa

i am being recruited by mensa. then i found out it was lefsa. and then i said see ya. nice to meet ya. leave the lefsa.

great question does poverty make you horny

god will provide. prison does too.

great question am i a bad person

i lose a little more patience as the day flies. my kindness has more prerequisites. temper creeps in at work. i pray an am not sure if i mean it. i skip through days often. above grade selfish. plan my exit weekly. and i indulge in the common joy of judging. if i am than i am comfortable with it.

great question why can’t the lonely be in farm-a-suit-a-kul commercials

less we show the mirror to our humanity. they do for the depressed. they ain’t real. a good an depressed person is a sloberring and maybe three weeks from clean. come on. show the rot that is the spot on.

great question can i see the end

i can see a end that is not natural. always going to be there. once you reach for the handle the door is never far.

great question should there be a holiday for all the people that because of visual reasons can never be elected to the white house

festivus

great question where does patronizing become deadly

i believe the biden escapades proved that.

great question if i did the cat walk of model lore what kind of crumbs would i throw to find my way back to the mother ship

burnt ends.

great question is it wrong for the couple to celebrate once they find out their kid is healthy

behind the seven god damn eleven.

great question where does dora the explorer end up

daytime as the youngest talk show host ever. goddamn right. then burn out. then rehab. then a book. such is the map of youth spent correct.

great question could i have a commercial asking what’s not in my wallet

the glee of the fatefully smitten.

great question if we nicked a college activated activist. a nick. would that bring enough reality into the situation hee-aah

take some of them old southern bones for sheriff an show them yut how slow they are to the sound of fury signifying something.

great question what are we looking for

affection

great question would i like criminals to be tortured instead of going to prison for decades on a god damn dime.

give them the option. they need it and we deserve it. we can do better. we should. we owe enough to try.

great question at what point are you a parent

when you start sacrificing. someday you’ll be thanked. until then, denial of the very love you sought to give.

great question if the uber driver farts do you think that is for the 4,567 time in the car

yep. tip accordingly.

great question if you have plastic surgery why not ask the regulars in that chore you call a life to turn around.

you say its bad, but the crap we put on our skin has to be worse cause we addicted to it.

great question could we trade china our yoga teachers for taiwan

don’t know why, but a colony of yoga teachers scares me. anyone who can lick their elbows cannot be trusted.

greats question can you tell a coworker they look good

not male to female. never. be lucky to smile at em. you never know the rapids beneath the falls.

great question is part of me dead

i think so. dead forever – reachable maybe, but to that i don’t know the way.

great question what would be jebus catch phrase

it’s in the hole

great question what state would have the best muffins

maine. good fur you. what you do for little blue balls. say hi to papa smurf.

great question how many actual rides has a uber driver given

fiteen. five tousand. come on. let’s live on planet earth. santer fucking claus has not made that many rides.

great question if i was the last person alive would i shout, ‘victory!’

if i could see my crotch i might too.

great question what happens to the women’s ego when they become a man

it’ll be a little sting when the steam goes out but you get use to be the one thrown about.

great question what age do you let your kid have a cell phone

home school em, won’t need a phone. solved that. or don’t have em. yes! yes! that is the winning ticket my god lord almighty don’t have em at all.

great question would unfrozen caveman lawyer been able to get oj off

no doubt. depth and skill. ooooph. the thing.

great question are we all invisible til love proves us otherwise

fair statement. those that never experience: paw patrol.

great question if it was leave it to the zombeaver would i watch

oh wally, i don’t think your brother is going to make dinner, seems his face is being digested. zombeaver, where would are fright be witout your endearing bite.

great question does a long beard make you smarter

acting!

great question could the cross christ been more dramatic if there was a thunderstorm

heavy stuff not coming down for a while. whole scene was full of themselves. sick of whole scene. not hip.

great question do cremators need to dress up

i think you don’t want to look too good because you could sneeze and get bob all over you.

great question if you have manners are you likely to eat a lot of salads

it stands to reason.

great question is tying the shirts around the waist as terminal as having it over the shoulders

it’s a risk few people are just not aware of. what can you do. their almost asking, if not begging for it.

great question is it true, that if no one can witness it, you are not lazy

how you doin

great question do men who smell nice drink expensive alcohol

fact. what are you throwing back?

great question you have a fighter’s attitude, and what of it

in the end the cries are never heard

great question do we all want to be left alone at work

good point. work begins when we see each other.

great question is it true that requiring a dress code is racist

we have rights. not when you work you don’t. different world. different rules. different strokes.

great question what age does jealousy turn into hate

first kid or late thirties when it don’t look like it gonna get going. walls creeping on you. sky lying to you. the whole damn system against you. and the kids keep on eating food you can’t afford.

great question if you drink wheat grass are you a pain in the ass

god damn lawn mowers.

great question what do they do with the socks that don’t sell

they create a whole new thing. it’s not three day old halibut. shame he died. damn shame when we fly away solo.

great question is music better with no one around

farting is, why not music.

great question after the earth is saved will it be renamed

tay presents brene’s earth. heh heh heh. the best of us for the rest of us.

great question if i climbed everest and farted, would that be the biggest fart ever

when yorkshire pudding was created. there you go england. grab on to that!

great question would a orphan feel better than a homeless kid

completely unkind. how? it is. we sell kids for thousands of dollars. not the point. we are sick. we were born that way. we are born when money is involved.

great question is cancer too big a business

yes. could be a cure. i don’t think so. let death make our soul songs sung true.

great question what would be the appropriate meal when you save the earth

dead meat. something green. stiff rod of bakery. brown barrled juice.

great question what do you do with the peoples who don’t pull their weight

religion. lots n lots of religion.

great question is the die already cast

our prayers are answered. our needs are met. our actions have spoken. and we are integrated into the stories of lives unknown.

great question are good people a sneak peek of heaven

there is no heaven, only texas.

great question is there medical mary jane anymore

weed. when you want to be on drugs but you don’t want to be on drugs.

great question what makes dog your best friend

they don’t drink your beer, fuck your women and take your job.

great question when will parents be allowed to put their kids into the portal

not soon enough. take that back. we put fit, physical youth into this floating bizarre of humanity. why shall kids be any different. there our kids. and they are our problem. you are mean. never said love was nice.

great question is it fair to say not all people work the same

sexist. you think men work harder than women. i just asked a question. i know what your question means. that men deserve more because they think they work harder than women because they have jobs they won’t give to women who deserve them. i tell you, rigor of the fight is enjoyment of its splendor.

great question if you preach are you profound

the world needs someone to give us a book report like we need a protest in the head. heh, heh, heh

great question if you bought a kid at target would it be behind the glass

i don’t think it would be any less awkward than adoption. maybe adoption has them in that sandwhich lazy susan and you get to look before you buy. i think the sandwhich might be more current. those damn little doors pain in me ass. i’m not looking for a hobbit. samich. damn it.

great question if i gave new born up for adoption would i hand it off like a pigskin

to be memorable. play action. that’s all we ever do.

great question should we be able to test tats on the blind

that is so insensitive. good to know. but is it wrong? to be insensitive is the most wrong a person can be. so, no tats on a blind woman. good to know. fair enough.

great question when will a dog teach at a ivy league school

when they bite a jew. how dumb can you be to pick on jews. better off picking on fat people. we might roll around in fury, that’s about it. gnaw on your leg. than lick it. like my cat. not fat. which makes me thin. and that is nice. course, she isn’t religious. she has no hate.

great question what is difference between medical device convention and avn awards

vegas. put avn awards in dakotas you might have a reason to rev those harley crotch ticklers.

great question do most people who pray think they have ability to manipulate god

i can’t explain prayer but for it works. that’s explaining it. explain you all day long. bring it. brought-en. me and my force of wit soldiers…..that’s you.

great question what about garth brooks and unanswered prayers.

artist exemption.

great question is it okay to use your kids as a means to get out of poverty

why the hell not. you’ve invested your conscious being into nomads of significance. if, if you can find some financial solace in their uprising, damn if that shouldn’t fall into the canyons of your jeans.

better off if i didn’t have kids. probably. is it too late? i’m too broke. too far from shore of trustworthy

great question in the unsung saga did it take poverty to find faith

you have to lose to find. cept if your liberal. you lose to whine.

great question what is something positive that can be said to offset the torrent

there is not a tax on farting.

great question should they take babies away from homeless people

i think so. seems harsh. obviously. sometimes you have to let go and start over. we don’t know how kids are going to turn out. we think with the right this or that it will be okay. mother’s love. father’s wallet. save lives by saving lives.

great question should gas stations sell bibles

if they had frosting on them and those little bags were a little bigger for the oncoming sinners.

great question how do you ask cancer stricken person what kind of odds they got

take them to vegas. they’ll get the hint and you’ll get the line.

great question what do you do if you get married to person with prosthetic hands

why would i think that? obviously you have not met a thursday.

great question positive question: is there always a connection to be made

thus is the comfort in the traveling of times.

great question does one ever get tired of entertaining others

it never gets old because in some way, some way, money, money monaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. i do think malkovich and buscemi are related. have to be. oooooph. dark alley, see ya later. thank you. a nice non sequitur.

great question would it be odd to ask someone to be god parents to my cat

no, not you. you have lives. i hope. i am a clinger. stage five.

great question if you are non white does losing your hair not hurt as bad

saying, you don’t see a lot of afro wigs. don’t. who looks. time i have. inkling i do.

great question legalize drugs

could it be worse? no. maybe less murder. less money to the wrong people. maybe.

great question is it dangerous to make sounds when you exercise

nobody should do it twice. today’s gym wipes hardly be a stain

great question do jeans look better the older they get

i buy ripped jeans. we don’t buy you. aha! fist bump. it’s what we do.

great question should leggings come with best if used by

best if used by chronic chaffers. the aged. slap of thigh against thigh. skin vs skin. ripping of the tender in the area where you find your gender. mmmmph. hurts. i know. i chafe. dissatisfied.

great question were early campfire farts better than today’s

much better. more natural. more acceptable because the laws of pleasant society had not begun to wring the neck of peasant society.

great question would i run a marathon stoned

i would have to be stoned to root at a marathon. close.

great question positive. the price of gratitude is a moment.

cause, and we all know it: it could be worse. sometimes i hate hearing that. sometimes i don’t.

great question do we assume america will be responsible for saving the world from america

i think that is the underlying premise. maybe the world ought to kiss our big beautiful ass. arse. the hiny. dairy air. trunk. name it like you want to and pucker up like you should.

great question would it be okay to wrap fish guts with the economist.

after you tell someone you read five minutes worth and you are five minutes smarter than them. heh, heh, heh

great question if you have a long tongue do you need to brush your teeth

i would like a longer tongue. get the attention for licka licka soft serve cone from three damn feet away. look at me. i’m a abnormality and a horrendous shot. connery. no discussion.

great question how do we know our sins are forgiven

god sent chuck norris.

great question when you are right how do you not lord it over everybody else.

fuck for trying. don’t hide that nugget. let us see what can be done through intellecutal jaunts.

great question if the mom dies with baby inside is it two viewings or one

oooph, tough. you say no, but i think yes. i do think you would have to go through the line twice. one set of flowers. come on. i’m talking viewings and your talking gibberish…….best damn gibberish in the world.

great question you have a little button that says stand up for eukraine on you. does that make you special

so special. i’m showing my support. and that probably means as much as that sham of fabric is worth you stuck that tool of futility on. save sentiment. send tomahawks.

great question why does the younger generation find it more acceptable to be repugnant with their social skills

we’ll get em. national service commitments. show you what youth means. shit yeah. we can cause we are here and you are there.

great question how long before conversation goes stale

thirty seconds. you the world’s greatest talker? no. I tune out after fiteen.

great question when its a half ass day do you even bother trying to put out.

you do what is the most possible with the least likely. are we all hero’s? we’re born hero’s. in this goddamn great country.

great question chicago can’t stop the murders, what do you do, what do youuuuuuuuuu doooooo

keep the guns, lose the clothes. there you go. on the house.

great question do people anymore need to ask to be put out of their misery

if you think your miserable, remember, long ago, so was some guy that got hung up on some nice lumber. you could be jebus. not chuck. very unchuck like.

great question if you play volleyball in the summer, on the weekend, when the lake path is crowded do we need to give you the look so you know we hate you

am i jealous of people who have lives? they are the farms of my wit. how should i love them ever more.

great question is there a better way to say you were saved by god

i am no longer a liberal. not funny. look at yourselves, you think people care. my lord. have another moral orgy you call a rally.

great question should we teach more people how to talk to themselves

i think so. do you have to be cray cray? i think a little. fist bump that. atta you.

great question biggest reason for unwanted babies

spite.

great question should shorter people stand more so people think they are tall

the tall shall sit. the truth shall come. amen, amen, aaaaaaaaaaaaaa, aaaaaaaaaaaamen.

great question should home depot sell holy water

i think father harris would approve. did the lawyers drink the holy water? no, just the kool aid. we’re doing our jobs. that smarmy utterance no longer appeases our patience.

great question is there a reward for keeping the prisoners who have no chance at parole alive

have to believe it’s money. somehow, when in doubt, say money. global warming. money. socialism. money. noodling. funny.

great question is it true, 90% of canned goods are idaho

yep. you wouldn’t think and then wham!, idaho. you do forget about them. sombitch. we sorry. we sorry.

great question if you have not gained weight in ten years, are you fit.

fucking fiddle.

great question if i only drank the milk of one cow, the same cow, my entire life would it mean something

life is good.

great question the goal is for everyone to ride a bike. someone steels your bike but rides it, what is the problem

only zuul

great question how much of a pain in the ass are you to those you love if you go to a rally.

we’re standing up for what we believe. what does that even mean? we are strong? how? we hold the people in power accountable. how? we talk. without the lonely would we have the troubled? shiiiiiiiiiit.

great question should we care less about people hit by tornado or by hurricane

hurricane. come on. we’re boarding up. you’ve checked out. we’ll see it through. i hope you don’t. thank you so much. we have a generator. i fart. you are ready. not waiting. someday. gtfo.

great question what if the town’s pphood has greater numbers than the delivery department of hospital

it means we might be able to save this marble called earth. go earth go. go earth go. go stro’s go. i like the stro’s. how you use a trash can on a national stage. atta you.

great question if you have to use the door the people are exiting from WTF

i didn’t notice. that says it all. you are mean. and you are treading on time better spent elsewhere.

great question how many years did my dad spend watching tv

tough. it seems that was the most important thing in his life. smokes. beverage. tv. life.

great question more people are getting hurt skiing, where is the problem

don’t know. not enough applause. we’re all rooting for you.

great question why is it the people who attack their face with metal are the exact people you would think they would do that

that’s discrimination. if i caught as many fish as you do excuses i’d be set for life. SCORE us: gazillion. them: not

great question is it sexist to only have boys

yes it is. how? doesn’t matter. it just is. what if its all girls? they deserve to be born. who knew you could make a life out of hating men. well you can. jerk. come on. come on. jerk. we’re friends. el jerk-o face-o.

great question what does good skin care get you

hot dog and a hummer

great question should they put all mailboxes in the ghettos

yes. then we could begin to understand each other by seeing us face to face. less the rich see the poor and the poor see the rich. both wonder, sum-of-a-bitch.

great question what is the difference between the rich and poor

gas-x

great question when is it art

when majority of the people don’t know what you are talking about. heh, heh, heh.

great question if i could, if we could, have real conversations with our animals could we cut down on the human traffic

i do think we speak love so we are not that far apart.

great question if you do your job in sports its a big deal. if we do our job its expected and no big deal. what’s going on man

someday, someday when sports are gone and the reflection we see is us, at last we’ll see the sun be up for us and the moon glow through our glory.

great question should we name a cloud after bonnie raitt

she has done made the anthem of sunday afternoon. sunshine. couch. animal. magazine over face. breathing in the bonnie to raise the moment.

great question do angels fart

never been to a D.A.R. meeting.

great question is it true fuck is caffeinated

fucking eh right it is.

great question boredom more dangerous than global warming

global warming is boredom………boo! Yeeeeeeeeeek! Xanadu.

great question would i like to have been able to grow a full beard so it could feel like mowing my face

why don’t you shave your legs? i am not submissive.

great question what does the second nose ring say that the first one could not

wanna boogie.

great question money = good parents no money = bad parents

who knows. we are only left to guess. parenting use to be about the parents. happen when we went off the gold standard.

great question if my dad danced at weddings would we have had a different life

yep. i imagine we all can play what if. big ol whiffleball.

great question if you die in a accident with nature can you blame that on people who don’t care about the earth

soon thoughts will be sued and death will save the innocent.

great question what are you thinking

i know. should they combine the voice with supreme court? yes.

great question should we be jealous of people in vanity fair

i don’t know. they show a lotta nip.

great question if someone reminds you while you are eating there is a healthier choice, does that include them

scare them fuckers away. shoooh! eat my spam. eat your liver in time.

great question how can education be so difficult

get the right brine. almost see why summers have to be off.

great question why can’t people be content to just change themselves

love is change.

great question is it fair to pick on a gender

men will survive.

great question have i said more stupid things being tired or being lonely

it is interesting what i say when i am lonely. ooooph. not good. it does take a while to get use to being around people again.

great question should their be a camp for elders

bridge. you kids and your games. zesty enterprise.

great question if you wear the same socks for a week do you have to wash the socks seven times

blow your mind. i do feel undervalued. overlooked. forgotten.

great question do smaller people get extra small small pox

the worlds that are out there. so easy to believe in the moment. not a bike lane joke per se. since we are here. yes.

great question should jewish people be the ones to save the earth

is anyone else even qualified. yep. their planet. our vacation.

great question are we headed toward a meaningless world

among the whiners. not the winners. not us. not today into the good right.

great question would jebus wear sunglass on the crosstown

the tears. about to do the dan dan levitan and you know you are leaving this shit show worse than you found it. come on. cry on your own time.

great question should you be paid to put on your face

i think we should be paid when you take it off. yeesh. you know, for the vengeance you have you still capitulate like you do. hisssss right back at ya.

great question do terminal diseases prove we have compassion

selfless loving is a unspoken dream

great question are you less likely to be a racist if you have means

now, the question is can you be a racist if someone is a racist against you? of course you can. racism doesn’t discriminate.

great question would theme music made last moments with my dad more meaningful

tension and eyes gone back set a mood no song could be used for.

great question is it true it is hard to find winners in this life

if you don’t talk to people. once you learn stories, hear the battles, know of the victories, what is witness to is the best of kind.

great question what is to become of the next generation

slip sliding away, yadda yadda yadda, slip sliding away. you don’t understand us. expecting a world without the world in it ain’t gonna bold well for you in it.

great question can you blame every bad thing about society on hippies

nexus of whining.

great question how many stupid ass questions should you be allowed per conversation

how you doin

great question do i think i will cry when my mom dies

I don’t know. i think i will celebrate her. i don’t know how tears will work into that. tough woman.

great question are you tougher if you talk about racism or sexism

talkin baseball……….having tough conversations for breakfast. that’s nifty, but you ain’t winning them tough games after breakfast. there is so much that can happen. put that in the envelope.

great question if i had one fan would it all be worth it

how you doin. not sayin, just sayin. you have a fan in me. for all that’s fort worth……..texas. the nutcup on our soul.

great question would i have surgery to remove fat, from me, near thanksgiving

I’m doin all right. i will be under three by end of the year. then who knows. i could be so good looking i might like myself again.

great question what age do you start sighing

fity. fity good number. when i weigh two fity that will be a good number.

great question is it best we don’t hear most people’s thoughts

but we read your mind when it is unhealthy. sure you do. could it be the sound whaffing up from my downtown. thought so. pardon the noise. tacos. tony’s.

great question do i think you can make your life interesting as you age

strip clubs. fascinating blend of bidness, pleasure and singles.

great question do you take out your nose ring to pick your nose

add more metal to the head. problem solved.

great question what makes a person truly interesting

foolish enough to care. brave enough to listen.

great question how many parents at the beach are trying to get the kid to go out a little farther

more than they admit. commitment is really a sentence and no one gets paroled.

great question should they sell leggings hanging in meat lockers

we all aching for an experience. never about the fashion, only the conversation.

great question should they make saving the earth cheaper so more people can do it

no. must make money to make the earth a better place so say one so say all. know what i’m not doing this weekend. pawty at my place.

great question are hurricanes orgies

wet, wild, half in the bag i think we got you call it a wiener.

great question is it interesting that leaves die without crying

sorry. just trying to pull in a little closer to the heart of fall. which this is.

great question what more do we need to hear

you look like a hellen

great question are summer camps great place for kids to get some paramilitary training

that is wrong. why do you have little miss perfect shooting hoops at the age of three. she can have female hero’s. you need hero’s, go to the cemetery and pack a lunch with the fallen. oooph. we hit. hit hard. we’re tough. we’re american.

great question would jebus walk on water to make eddie money happy

who knew eddie was in the bible. sombitch.

greats question would conjoined get colonoscopies at the same time

i think so. good money on it. long day for dr rosen. if their tall.

great question should we use prisons to experiment with group exercise classes

put out a add for recently retired women. bout damn right. we love to move around. easy edna, it ain’t love, it’s just bidness.

great question no baby talk in public, yes?

good. we can always take the baby away that’s not a problem. you talkin is. conversation poisons the air. why do you think models don’t talk. saving the air. maybe that should be the game instead of a planet we don’t know for a movement we’re not sure.

great question would vegans take some earth out with them for a walk

twig. handful of clay, or, or flowers for the romance that never happens in a life never fulfilled. ruff!

great question how much good news would we need to change america’s spirit

a thank you by the rest of the world might go a long way. yep. call it gratitude, but call it long over do. fist bump that.

great question how do you inspire kids

teach them what money can do and what no money can do.

great question would i be impressed if a figure skater turned into a water fountain during her routine

i would flip back from the indignity of greedy wives. if they could add a shooting range to figure skating we could round up the interest that just never seemed to be there after wack-a-mole.

great question non sequitur vs doctorate

give me the non and i’ll give you a nod.

great question would the wsj get up when the economist comes to the table

tough. wsj can make you money but the economist can make you. why not everyone stand and shake, shake, shake senora…..

greats question do i think trader joe’s grows its employees

they always seem to have the fresh out of the bag appeal. i think jebus got tired of the ear traffic and took the quickest way out of dodge. yep. chuck hears chuck. that’s chuck 101.

great question are we all late for love

people who ask questions about love should be shot.

great question is it true there is no wit in porn

score one for wit. not you walter. not you.

great question do i eat enough marshmallows

technically, they don’t exist. sometimes neither do i. but that is when i am around people. go cry somewhere else. just sayin. we’re tired of your saying. fine, then kiss my usa loving ass.

great question someone says, i can’t read your mind, what are you suppose to say

context translates.

great question do i have a grudge against my parents

i don’t have a grudge. there has been a dark period and darkness lingering, that’s all. nothing other than life happening.

great question burning question. easier for a person to avoid a moving car than a moving car to avoid a person

seems obvious. they should be more careful. what about you using them peepers. they should slow down. it’s still gonna hurt when they drive you two fity of the first tee. maybe they should be illegal. if i can’t be happy then no one will be happy and the whole world will be unhappy. Gazillion: Us. nothing: them

great question why do we need cars

so we can go to kelly’s for the eye candy

great question is febreze smarter than glade

yes. names for the scents. love the salesmanship. mmmmph. now. if glade would sell: fucking fresh fucking scent. i would buy glade.

great question if you have done something that you have to tell other people about does that defeat the purpose

if you honor the first rule of life – nobody cares – then everything else falls into place. what about us: we are above rules. we are american.

great question would SEALS rescue me from minnesota

maybe we should rescue them from liberals. you go against them you go against the grain of patriotism their destiny bleeds for. be lucky to love the country as much as they choose to defend it.

great question are tats the bumper stickers of our souls

rat-a-tat-tat-that-fact

great question a better person if fit

no. no one knows the person because of their size. easier to spot em, but you don’t know em. you don’t know us. you just get more and more obnoxious.

great question if a person can’t see your tat, does the tat exist

no. tat with no eyes is not tat but a skin rat. Baaaaaaurn.

great question do i think they cremated my dad too soon

yes. would have liked more time with him. glad my brother got to see him before they took him. shame it went so fast right there. sure it might have been normal but it wasn’t right by me. got to hold my dead cat longer. cried more for my cat. sorry dad. don’t know what to say about that.

great question where would we be without labels

amish

great question after watching coachella can you succeed in music without capturing the visible aspect

we now hear through our eyes. allure of the rock show. see them live. and be around the arrogance of the serfs. i think not. you don’t know what you are missing. that’s the point.

great question would i sell lasts words to people so they can be eloquent in the step forward into death’s den

I would. be nice. you want that cinematic moment for the glory of life. if my dad could have said: son, i’m leavin and i hope you do what you can so all bike lanes leave with me.’ i would remember you. i didn’t. but i did.

great question how much should a date cost

a good date should not be more expensive than a nice sunset.

great question money early or later in life

later. old age without money is to be free of dignity.

great question are we a whole lot safer than we think we are

tough. i think if you pay attention to the news you expect the worst. gleeful schnocker is the abc news feller. giving the worst possible to the least likely. shiiiiiiiiiiit.

great question what hasn’t sixty minutes not promoted

strawberry cheesecake.

great question if i had a mansion with fifteen shitters and i plugged them all up would i need fiteen plumbers

one. be happy to have the work. few talents i have. one is number two. good to know. when the legion unites tis will know my nights.

great question can you call a pregnant woman fat

you can. you want your balls i’d choose a different tact emma.

great question if i drafted jebus could i say i did not expect him to be available

never expected me to be available this late in the round…..not true. i had no expectations for my life. this is all a bonus because there was no onus.

great question is their, they, them wtf

tool to control the right of way we use to call conversation. now as many speed bumps as holes in the head. good or bad? don’t know. proof of motive. to bring you that drug.

great question why should a cat be cheaper than a ferret

beastmaster. you some of a bitch. you fargan icehole. you glorious basten of american cinema.

great question do animals take things for granted

just live, just live…..they live…….heh, heh, heh. i had to. not because i wanted to, because we needed it.

great question does a lit candle mean you are expecting a hump

cept yankee. threesome. what you will need to afford one. heh, heh, heh. skaaaaa-ore.

great question was it wrong that my dad got to sleep into death

i think the ghosts got to him early enough. deserved easy path to off ramp

great question you have seven kids how do you expect not to be poor

we don’t believe in birth control. we don’t believe in you. give us five and keep the change.

great question if you die your hair and you are older than sixty five is that a sign you are ready for the zombie apocalypse

i feel better when my hair is that color. we all like to live a lie and then lie about our lies. finding the honest person is an accident in fortune.

great question how tight does the scarf have to be around the neck

tell people: you can talk not tight enough. once your blue, it’s almost through.

great question should they make a morning diet coke

yes. yes. yes. more diet coke the better. america lives on diet coke. and a damn fine america it is.

great question do therapists eats coco puffs

like they are not sick for listening to depths of our misery. shame, shame, shame on you. eat the puffs and soon you will be coocoo like the rest of us. find out it is bliss to be amiss.

great question should the supreme sing acapella

like they carry a country they should carry a tune.

great question combine religion and nasa

by god yes and then, two things we don’t need will be together. both looking for signs of life. just like us.

great question how do you not know if you packed bullets

give it to you for sticking with the lie. that’s some good bs. if i could bs like that i would……heh, heh, heh.

great question if a poor country can’t afford to fight its global warming, could america fight for that poor country

of course we can. and since theoretically it won’t matter, we can, theoretically, do it with a smile on our face and laughter in our hearts. moo-hoo-hahahaha! ahhhhhhh, it hits you where you want to be touched.

great question do liberals teach immigrants how to whine

how else would you get to be so good at it…..shiiiiiit.

great question what is AOC

ever to be the vixen of vapidness.

great question do you end up learning what you need to know

you do. might be too late. in the lands of second chance there is but to begin the dance.

great question would ark-a-tects have the best tats

winner at etch a sketch.

great question is it sexist that the wedding dress is more expensive then renting the tuxedo

good thing the man makes more money.

great question should there be a limit to accusations

at some point there needs to be fact. at that point there needs to be hope.

great question does yoga prolong loneliness

promoting self love. sonsabitches.

great question will someday the shock wear off and it will only be kahn

Kahn!!!

great question if i confessed my sins to my cat would that make her a priest

wears a collar.

great question would it be a amish thing to light your farts

as if they live off of candles alone. come on. we know math. and dow. good little flick.

great question positive: is it telling in any of the ten that given, no mention of lanes

thus heaven is yes when we dismiss the cute little two wheel trains.

great question is it going to take the end of fun to save the planet

does appear that way. earth will be new and we will all be old.

great question what are we suppose to do now that we are here

occupy various administrative buildings.

great question can you sue the hospital if they cut the leggings off

farm the organs, save the leggings.

great question would a nudist have a bun with their hot dog

if, they can afford a wiener.

great question you can’t drink lotion, but rub it on your skin and it goes in. what is this lotion we speak of

slickery. trickery. by god it’s a mystery.

great question and to what does pope matter

sadness shall not be lonely.

great question if you hire a trainer should they, wearing stable gloves, cut up a apple in front of your in quarters and then feed it to you one piece at a time while patting your head

you damn well know that is a murphy’s romance moment. still, i’d eat the apple like that. for the humor. for the moment. for us.

great question if you haven’t gained weight in thirty years, are you fat

oooooph. tough call. good catholic girl. aren’t they all. i don’t know. thirty years weigh the same. not more. to me, that’s fitness baby. that’s all it is.

great question if you play the harp, how much tea do you drink in a week

gallon. but with lemon and no sweetner. you could use a little sweetner honey

great question can you tell the bereaved: hey, at least they were not murdered

class. People always want to die in their sleep. i sleep to die.

great question can you really expect anything from anyone

expect all they really want is the best for those that they love at all.

great question can you ever get mad at your imaginary friend

beauty eh.

great question good fart question: can catchers fart if they don’t like the call

ooooph. tough. i say yes. heat of the moment.

great question what do i have to do to make it out of this spot

i don’t know. not die. maybe do things i don’t do to get results i have not gotten. seems easy. but i’m american so i can. and we will cause we are.

great question what makes the difference from one person to the next

gas-x

great question how many pairs of underwear do you go through at a day at the state fair

one to get there. one for the curds. one for the beer. and then one after you hang with the carnies. six.

great question is a little bit of bullshitting with good member enough to put me in a good mood for the rest of the shift

pretty much. a chuckle is best. ol’ gene boy how you had it right.

great question does reading one book over and over make you smarter

i read the same books over and over. to stay positive. it’s good to have other voices in your head.

great question is it true we will never have stars like we used to

internet has cut lifespan of celebrity. pressure to be god greater than reward. the worst of us used to destroy the best of us. should be the other way around. in this country we can turn that around. no one needs to be a god but the light need not cut to pieces.

great question yoga keep you regular

if barking is regular – woof!

great question if two women get on the elevator and both wear the same perfume

blame man. when in doubt, blame man

great question better the car better the food delivered?

I think so. KITT delivers my food it would taste phenomenal. What’s KITT? Off with your head! atta us. things happen. right on time.

great question does smell indicate importance

power smells right.

great question if ponch smoked a roach would jon have had to

then occupy various administrative buildings.

great question am i afraid to die

more afraid to find out how good i can be.

great question is it wrong to use someone else’s trash if it is for recycling

one small bag for them, one big bag for earth. go earth.

great question can small people wear stetson hats

i do think that is as offensive as calling them a minority. then why do it? keep windows to worlds open

great question how does the past hurt so long

cause we have a huntch that never to be hurt is the standard when we are all a little beat up cause that’s what happens in life. you get a little beat up. get a little going on. put a drink in your hand.

great question do vegans feel they can speed

technically, they are a plant.

great question is it wrong that fresh produce gets more showers than me

there are no right or wrong. momentary fact of things.

great question do long hugs count more than short hugs

we long for meaning. it’s all it is. one inch at a time.

great question could they have made a iron man for stephen hawking

why would i think that? thursdays.

great question are hardware employees the most stoic

dusty. cranky. stoic. nuts and bolts. they got screws.

great question is jane austen the precursor to benevolent brene

a feminist in her own right. is that right then that man made feminism? i believe the score on that is: Gazillion. heh, heh, heh. we do it all and for what, to get nothing in return but the scorn of a new day’s lament.

great question should you ask your sock if it is hungry before you put it on

ample time.

great question will we be friends when i have money

good friends. not good friends, life long friends. hunt it down and report back to me. you know where to find me. if only it didn’t take so long for myself.

greats question how do you mug a nudist

give em the shirt off your back.

great question if you had five homes would you want five different brands of toilet paper

afford the good kind. get some ten pound mega roll. cause if you get the mega roll you don’t use as much according to the experts. and a fine group of people they are.

great question if you do covers of other people’s music are you a preacher

Preachers. the road signs of humanity.

great question should zoo’s have wealthy people

soon new york will. don’t put your hands in the cage dear, they may give you money. be afraid of the rich. all they want to do is work

great question if you are not funny how can you love god

there it is.

great question biker cheats other bikers and we are suppose to care cause

just checking.

great question if you don’t see a good marriage can you have one

i’m sure you can. the fact they have a tail should be of no concern to you now.

great question once you have built the bomb shelter how much do you want to use it

end of the world and you’ll be laughing. ha! cause you won’t die for you’ve got ample supplies. what dear friend will you have to talk about. true, grey’s anatomy will never die because that’s a what a good grey’s anatomy does.

great question which chopstick is the left one

ample.

great question would i like a loading dock on my house

be nice to know where to put the coffee can for the smokes. i think it has to be off brand. not one of them plastic ones neither. a good ol’ earth robber. we wouldn’t use donny’s.

great question am i mad at people not believing in me

i could be mad but there are always the curtains to be drawn.

great question would i like to live in a smoker in the winter

tell you. nap with a pork but. not bad. wake up with a burnt end and know it’s all good. what about smoking vegetables. believe they call that a doobie.

great question if we have good days does that mean we are okay

no. everything is ruined. the world is falling apart. then i say stranger: fart. that is disgusting. and i say if we ever knew what was inside of us we would be disgusted. we are always fity fity til something trow a uno to the other half showing the side of the moment. sounds like grace.

great question should they have a men’s and women’s cemetary

yes. show them. jerks.

great question since sharks don’t have breasts are they happier

there you go. you just know discovery would try and motorboat. you do. they have the itch.

great question could willy wonka have created the never ending roll of tp

then we would have movie with tall people so we can complain about using those that are not. shiiiiiiiit. you can’t make people happy but you can piss them off which, makes you happy. one for two and all for us.

great question could they make better cologne for smokers

tax the shit out of that. cute we want to stop the people from killing themselves. at some point, at some point it’s gonna swing back on you. yep. let the noise leave so it doesn’t deafen your privilege.

great question is it true shy people are better with money than talkers

it appears to be the case. nice to know who to hit up when you need scratch.

great question should you put suntan lotion on a corpse

what’s the difference. it’s what we say.

great question would women be better kickboxers because they get more pedicure’s

it would stand to reason.

great question do you have to wear your name tag when you are in a room of blind people

that is so cruel. you care, give them the money the job market has not dared. maybe we’ll think about it. first time hurts. second time makes sense.

great question if the spouse has the bigger gut do you get to control the remote more

sexist. well, mind reading has taken a step backward. the bitter one controls the entertainment gun.

great question what are we to think of al gore now

maybe he should’ve blown clinton. then, then infinitely relevant. heh, heh, heh. shot heard around the world. stil funny. after all that and you can’t get rich. in the wrong country.

great question does the fact i heard my dad’s last breath mean more to me as time goes on

it has a part in me that i won’t forget.

great question who wins when it is the controllers vs the controlled

controlled could ignite faster than then controllers could handle. uprising is possible when the pitch is perfect.

great question how much is too much to spend on childcare.

prison ain’t cheap.

great question if jebus comes back does that mean our sins are no longer forgiven

we have chuck, you can keep the change.

greats question does terminal speak louder than a pregnancy

i think death is more commanding. we have to see who has died so we can forget about who is coming.

great question is the person in better shape in control of the marriage

the one with the tail. for our hearts ride in their comfort.

great question does scotch even have to advertise

it has the pull of its charm. am i sad i will never know. no. it is an illusion after all. and when i could afford scotch it will be nice to know that if i know anything at all.

great question can a vegan be a racist

minority makes you innocent. in the club they call it. shiiiiiiiit.

great question when will schools stop existing

i think we’re close. one more pandemic and it will be a free for all…..til everybody wants to send their precious to a catholic school. thus the new crop for the priestly beasts. and it goes on like only it can.

great question what is the great illusion

pain absolves you of responsibility.

great question can you write classical music stoned

you do have to be stoned to be around people who listen. we will have another pledge drive. and another chance not to tell us the truth. blame el trumpo for you are subversive in the element of your doing. i have wanted to rip them a new arse. mmmmph. to blame instead of attract. not in our america. not now. not ever.

great question where is my training camp

small room. big white bowl.

great question if you don’t have to mean it, why don’t more people say nice things

my love language.

great question would i like to go to a nudists funeral

no one said thursday was the best day of the week. it just happens to be the hill we ride over to the freedom of friday’s shadow.

great question do i think my dad got to go with dignity

there was no force or pressure, he just went away. the fact his bride was sleeping in bed with him when he died made it better. touching. more so that she did not leave after he did.

great question can kids start yoga as soon as they wear onsies

by god yes. yoga starts with onesies and ends never. we are always stretching. the glory of namaste.

great question should relationship coaches flush more often

i think that is the drawback to knowing better. you got the good shit. all the answers to others problems. so convenient. so nice. we love to help. how is your marriage? the vet says she is in good health. of course she is.

great question if you have a peloton do you get a discount on your tesla

yep. show them the wedgie and give off two fity. helluva deal. all because you want to be hip. ha! we find you and we roast you. thus is the fit of our fantastic.

great question do we all have to feel the same

chuck, unit, core, god, country.

great question have we ever been more scared of ideas

we are. the fight to own the traffic is overdone. if it fits it fits. if it doesn’t it doesn’t. if this is it……underrated. good news, good news.

great question should women’s whigs be better than what they have ever been

yes. no women shall be bald. take away the nail treatments but leave the head wheat.

great question when can you date if your spouse has a handicapp

I think if you are lucky enough to find someone you put them on lay-a-way.

great question if you like snow can you just take a cold shower

problem solved.

great question does the quality of your life rely on the ability to entertain yourself

i would say. i have a good life. i do. hope you do too.

great question how do you turn yourself on day after day

go a little nuts. discover new sides of self. make fun of liberals. gift that keeps on giving. we are the best part of this country. no! the best part of the country has been, and will always be, the blood spilt for the flag.

great question how do you not bring anything an think you deserve

america runs on work. that is your country calling.

great question do you either love hold steady or like hold steady

just a band man. yeah and music is just between the ears. love. that is the answer when you have to guess.

great question what is the difference between sitting alone at work or sitting alone at home

farting.

great question if you put on sunscreen and then get your baby a tan, is that okay

i’d wrap the little fucker in tinfoil in the winter. keep it warm. yep. you can take the steak ems from before and make a little lunch that is a lot about love and a little about you. you are a sick human being. your point. you should not be allowed to be around people. probably not. if i were, i wouldn’t be around you. thank you. no, thank you.

great question should they have camoflodge leggings.

as the night will attest they do hide the rest.

great question bonnaroo or coachella

puh-lease. bonna what

great question would you have to put both conjoined in the witness protection program

if your having fun with what ifs you do have to employ that kisssssssss……ahhhhh billy. every year and every year is better than the one before.

great question if you read this am i fucked

i would assume the likelihood to be strong to quite strong.

great question if you know you can lose the weight is that the same as losing the weight

same fucking ballpark.

great question is it by weight or age you don’t carry your kid

I think if you got a butterball, let them walk their way out

great question is poturri a perfume

modern day mothballs.

great question when do you let your kids see who you really are

family reunions.

great question who knows

tyler knew.

i’ll let you finish that one. a unheralded flick at that.

great question is it okay to fart at the perfume counter

them betties don’t even know. hopped up on fair-ah-mones. randy. amorous. obnoxious.

great question if you have one arm should you get those nails done for free

i think so. handicapp fashion rule.

great question isn’t it great that no matter how good and memorable one day is, for all you want it to be, the next day is new

I’m still me. you are still you. we are still us. but, it is not the same. refreshing. zesty. fresca.

great question is vegan the new kosher

we don’t have the hate for the vegans. how can you hate a lawn mower.

great question once you are lonely is it like riding a bike

there is always the scar. will i smooth mine over? i will cover it til we laugh about the similarities of you and i. aha….aha ha….ha, ha, ha. ahhhhh. til then let us remember what it is and is not. of us, but not us at all.

great question should they have canoe lanes

what about cayak’s. and paddleboards. sure. just go a little farther out. that triangle means no harm.

great question is fencing another way for people to think less of others

yes. we are better. and you are followed by who for what for why.

great question if you look good with clothes on do you assume you look good naked

that is why that nasal song sounds sweet so specially so.

six. not bad. better. not good. better.

great question when do you feel you’ve done your best but you feel you’ve done your worse

let your kid serve mass.

great question is it easy how we get first impressions wrong

how we doin

great question would nuditsts be the best tattoo client

i don’t know. i don’t. perfectly nice arm and then bam! a term paper. tats are but the scratch’s of despair.

great question what would a vegan give out on halloween

seed

great question even if they are family should you be happy if someone wants to be in the same room with you

as you get older you take company for granted. it’s why i always carry a ball with me.

great question you find out your kid and dog are terminal, what makes you feel worse

i would think if you have twins it would be fido. and if it is triplets not a question. why don’t i like kids. it’s their proxy that gets us into trouble.

great question if you are a biker can you be a racist

minority rule. you can still be a fine ass. don’t let that slip that pinball game you call skully.

great question would i pay for a persons tat if i could use the tat to promote me

it is incredible that the smurf found that many people in our pool. my lord. all persuasion is either sex or money. what about power. power is sex and money.

great question how do you keep going

you get what you want.

great question is encouragement flammable

highly dangerous. not you. you do what you do in way no other has done.

great question if you don’t swear do you want to swear

you do. somehow you think that line you don’t cross gives you the integrity you don’t have. fuckin-eh right. it ain’t what comes out of the trap but for what comes out of the soul. swearing is unacceptable. it is the whiskey of our language.

great question i can’t dance. how do i rectify this situation

i dont know. it’s just not good. not good. i can’t even do it alone at home. damn. damn it all.

great question too early to have issues. friday. i don’t know what is wrong with me. maybe because i have problems with confidence. probably it. likely it. confidence is something that eludes me.

great question which is worse a man crying or a woman crying

man. then you know shit went down.

great question is chicago our middle east

yes. i say let them get it out of their system then lock it up.

great question do i think i could sell affection

hand, touching hand, lighting fart…..

great question do yoga teachers feel like they are pet store owners

we all lap up the aura of sockless jebus.

great question do they have bike lanes in inner cities

jane and john doe, a big fat no no. it’s not safe. when is biking safe. we have to be cautious. bullshit. you only care about the well to do riders. we see how it is. typical typical.

great question if the woman is obviously taller than the man in the relatioship are they in charge by law

more than two inches you gotta give it up. that seems so wrong. seemingly. arrowhead. with me or against me, you can still be for us.

great question would it be wrong to hug my favorite tree neked

……got ya. i don’t have a favorite tree. i do. i do. there is one that has kept me company. hope it don’t come down. been good to me.

great question does it matter what the vet did in the service of his country

no. we are allowed to have a hierarchy and it starts with them.

great question should i gets in trouble if i put barbeque sauce on my kid at the water park

scare the shit off them mothers who can’t take a joke. what is the worse that could happen: no bbq sauce for a year. okay. ketchup and brown sugar and you eaten like a child’s booger.

great question would it be wrong to bring a camelback to a funeral

in texas you pack a lunch, a lemonade and a luger. texas. half of what you think you are and all of what we need you to be.

great question why am i in a good mood

someday the angels have my back. the sun leads me on. all the birds done singing my song.

great question when does the it’s not you its me not work

msnbc.

great question what is the fail safe if you don’t shower

you become a writer. lest you think i am in a tux. i am in flux

great question what country will we adopt to do their global saving

now. you know where this is going.

great question can you use a model as a kite

floss. heavy string could set you back. don’t come at me wit your artistic integrity. we know how that went and we will know how you go. up and away. like tomorrow’s yesterday.

great question should cyndi lauper have worked for timex

that song moves me. as does landslide. better to know i can feel than be ashamed that i have felt.

great question how many pounds can leggings hide

15 and three 8’s tops.

great question positive: do you realize farting is not in the bible

yep. all that fun forgotten for freedom.

great question what if, what if they used the augusta for a cemetary too

it’s where cbs is buried. got ya. as though you don’t spoon on amen corner. and then, then on 18 you just roll on the landing neked and nuanced.

great question is it right that america’s nuclear weapons keep world in safe

we are a big country

great question is listening for the weak

articulation is for the strong. listening is second.

great question if you go to a play do you hope to learn something new about yourself

no. but. do have something to say at the office to people who do not pay attention to your precious orifice.

great question can you only be happy if you save the earth

tell ya. them folks that put death into the victims of vaginal chance, and live a life right, oooooph. oooooph. them folk got a nice grip on the reaper and the holy fodder.

great question is diffusing the same as tea buying

it is. i diffuse. i digress. i digest. i divide hope from fear and share the winnings with you.

great question are people better behaved at more expensive grocery stores

irv doesn’t have to clean up riff raff in aisle 7.

great question how do you tell your boss,’ hey, lighten up francis’

generally speaking most hierarchy are aloof so you can get away with shit right under their roof.

great question could a single pair of leggings stop the tank at tea enema square

they do cure silence. true. it’s why nuns don’t wear leggings. yep.

great question do they have shake n bake for cannibals

body bag stuff

great question if a lawyer is arrested can they talk to themselves

to get themselves off, yes. lawyers. the pledge pin of our demise.

great question is it true man has fed women greater than

we give your life meaning. well ms snarky, we have given you the fuel to come towards the new day.

great question if a white couple adopts a black kid does the black kid then think like a white person

inflammatory no doubt, but interesting all the same. i would say both. exposure is the word. cute show. no edge.

great question is cliff diving viagra

in lue of personality. right of passage. i do hope you pass rightly.

great question is the tension out there significant or is it merely the left peeing on the petunias

tolerance is what we expect not what we fucking give. oh, he is the worst. he is different so we must shit shame shabbadoooodooowap. all kinds of tickity boo.

great question would it be fitting if teachers and nurses married each other because they both work so hard

they do. oh, they really do. deserve each other. martyr’s from another martyr.

great question who is my favorite all time swimmer, all time

jaws.

great question should vegan soldiers only fight other vegan soldiers

it would be fair. have to be fair. take turns bleeding. heh, heh, heh.

great question if country music is for the summer is folk music for the winter

folk is for our discontent. it hits home. as if you can afford one. we are a better people. and death is a better friend than you deserve……..boooo!!!

great question positive: when your prayer is answered do you ever feel less lonely

sometimes i have to remind myself.

great question what ever will the people who have saved the earth do with their free time

ball-in-the-cup

great question is news anxiety

that’s all it is.

great question do blind woman know they have cleavage

no. you can look. technically, does not exist.

great question what do you do when the people take your kindness for granted

fart. rip it and leave the scene as the dew does damage damn done did do.

great question what is my rule for lost and found.

they lost it and i found it. problem solved.

great question. to women, does men’s money taste better than women’s money

not funny. it’s a little funny. sherby. oh sherby. you jest.

great question should other people choose your tat because we will have to see it

makes sense. i like the one that sews your mouth shut. heh, heh, heh

great question is protesting the same as eating tofu

two things that are fake. that’s damn funny.

great question if you get to seventies and there isn’t one person whose life you’ve made better do you try and do something about that pdq

i hope i give. right now i don’t know that i’ve done that. in my mind there is an illusion that says i have. at times i feel it has to be money. in truth, i don’t know what it is. i look for something big when it probably is not.

great question is the bible possibly the biggest game ever invented

ball-in-the-cup.

great question do you divorce past eighty

democrats divorced biden……………when he was awake.

great question would it be wrong, if, if, it isn’t working out to bring the three week old to planned parenthood

i don’t see why not. sick man. DEATH is death. we only lament the possibilities not the soul.

great question are you more proud of your barf if it is from an expensive restaurant

there you go. nothing against the castle. it’s a good barf. an honest barf. a true barf.

great question positive: when you realize the accidents you did not get into pur the divine do you understand your peace

it becomes clear

great question if i studied as much as i have watched movies would i be writing this to you here now.

probably not. is that good? you make me feel less lonely and more like a man. i appreciate that.

great question should lotion have protein you can absorb

lotion. date in a bottle. sombitch. usually are.

great question do i think david foster wallace could do this

don’t know. damn if we don’t want to see them see it thru.

great question are we to presume jebus was illiterate

yes. fact. don’t remember him going to rocco’s school of type writer repair. what school did he not go to again…….all of them. ha! blather. blather. blather. acting like it mattered. alas. not chuck.

great question wasn’t there white smoke coming out of biodome

heh, heh, heh.

great question why is man’s weight loss less of a thing than women

we get judged on our looks. and don’t you judge each other on the same scale. not the point. it never is. could it just be that it feels good to look good because after a while you lose sense of self you want to be for what you have accepted yourself to look. sadly it could.

great question do professional weight lifters have better farts

by and large yes. sometimes clean and jerk is wind aided. yep. sayin. beware crouching tiger, hidden sphincter.

great question do you push the kid down the sledding hill, or, or do you strap them on and then push them down

you strap em on and then, then, the silicon based, non caloric lubricant. woooosh!! honey, we’re free! get twister, neighbors and loose the clothes.

great question what sport is best watching drunk

activism.

great question who is the funny person that thinks toilet paper has to be perforated

mitch kumsteen

great question would my dad have been better if we had less kids

don’t know. since he took of code of silence unto his heart it is hard to believe it would have changed.

great question would it have been wrong to hang laundry on the cross

get that nice cross breeze.

great question would harry carey and howie cosell have a long hug

i think they provided the best of the whimsy. no matter the egregious of their character. less we make the visible leviathans when we only want their company.

great question which means more: sir or ma’am

sir. it’s cause it’s sexist. and don’t we all think our competition alive.

great question should you get a physical when you get a tat because they will have seen you neked

make no mistake about it depity

great question if the pope is not on anti-depressants why the hell not

bible is one big depressant. lack of context. were to see the waters come thru might have had the story more so instead of less than.

great question should women thank men for men making women look so good

say aaaaamen. aaaaaaaaamen. amen amen aaaaaaaaaaaaaaamen.

great question young people are drinking less but getting more tats, am i missing something

you wouldn’t understand our generation. i don’t think you do either. your just a disgruntled old fat fart. face. jerk face.

great question could we have a running of the bulls down the 18th at the augusta

nice to see them squirm. now, now, cheer for your life. Liars!!!

great question you have fity beautiful babies chilling. A ugly baby is dropped off by shamed parents. When they go to pick up, would it be wrong to grab a good looking baby

nothing wrong there. the love is the same. it’s not their baby. honey, once they start breaking the law it’s everybody’s baby.

great question would i go to prison if i got to share a cell with a pet

sometimes i feel i’m already there………sympathy?……..kidding. i’ve got it all right. people are good to me. i like to think i’m good. and the cat talks to me like no one else would. it’s a good time.

great question the longer you stay at the hospital what are your chances of falling in love with ice chips

after nurse sub zero brings them to you with a days worth of scorn. we have a hard job. so don’t all of us honey. slap a smile on and think of ol’ america.

great question i wipe ass all day would i not be a little grouchy

i kiss ass all day and i am not a peach but damnit if i don’t paste on a smile for the while.

great question what age can man tell a woman she look good

fashion show. you hit the note with that pivot. and the chin pronunciation was absorbent.

great question fart question: is it true 1812 overture is the best classical music you can fart to?

rodeo suite

great question would dateline do a story on dateline if dateline killed someone

dateline. showing us sinners day after day and for what but money. you bring the filth home and glam it up like it is something to be shown. that an good american being if you ask dis human being. or us. we tough. we right. we the class we about.

great question do the starving need to exercise

just run the boston marathon. it’s historic. so is your lack of appeal.

great question be odd to pet hitler’s cat.

a bit.

great question doesn’t second place make first place look better

oh you kamala. the hell we would have known. raiding the moment did you. find that sassafrass palin and pedicure your literary occupancy.

great question what is that thing we call sleep

drugs. fact. which is why you do trade the wooby for a comforter. tough kid. great vacuum cleaner. whatever it takes.

great question how dangerous is it when we don’t know if we are going to get a ice age

we could live in the we don’t know but we are so hungry to stick it in the face of anybody less the zombie apocalypse.

great question positive: giving has no end

it’s pretty to think so…….papa h. if only you were eloquent in your solitary.

great question in futuristic movies why don’t they use green energy

they know what it will be like. liars!!!

great question what social ill can’t be solved by eliminating bike lanes

……………………………………………heh, heh, heh

great question do people who go to sotheby’s have better marriages

you bet. don’t talk to each other. that is how you last.

great question did they have porn on the apollo 13

“houston, we have a threesome.”

great question how soon do you turn your kids against your spouse

once your doing the diapers begin the indoctrination and then slowly ease them out of the house and into the shadows of the valley of the crescent moon.

great question will we drive cars that run on kombucha

I got the runs on kombucha so i don’t see why not

great question if you switch genders do you have two birthdays

two crotch’s. two birthdays.

great question do you swear more the greater than stress

thus no f-bomb in the b’ book. there was no stress just bs.

great question do nudists vote

up or down.

great question do your feet change gender

i don’t know. heart doesn’t change gender. blood doesn’t change. what changes but the locker rooms. shiiiiiiiiiit

great question apple orchard good place to lose a kid

to start yeah. leave it in the space between bails of hay. not bad. they stay warm and you stay fresh.

great question what is the record for being full of shit

Catholic church. all the way up to the vatican.

great question other profession majority filled by minorities other than sports

gangs. not diverse. bring it up during parent gang conference night. might not give you the answer you want me to.

great question you don’t give a shit. how do you find the energy

belvita. how you doin. come into my belly. give me of your being. allow my gut to be warm. i cherish you so. belvita i hunger for you love. heh, heh, heh.

great question where is the thin line between cute and annoying

progressives. progressives cats.

great question if i pet a trader joe worker would that be weird

weird. as if there is a weird in our time. timely. yes. thanksgiving time. buy a punkin and a scratchin jo.

great question if they had nightrider after hours, would kit have been manual transmission

oh michael, is it that you or is that me, i don’t think it matters, shift me daddy……ahhhhhhh. us.

great question is dr ruth judge judy’s wing woman

it was estelle but that lasted so long. tough couple of nuggets. helps that their short. for the upkeep. ruff!

great question how many years must a relationship have to have before having kids

two years, 3/8ths tops. i do think you need to be top flight communicators. tell me nostradomas how good a communicator you are: go fuck yourself. not that bad.

great question how much testosterone does a man lose if the woman is driving him

going rate is two years of ball pride. yep. three if somebody see’s you. four if you know them. good to know.

great question what is the secret when you have a bad attitude and contempt

lie lie lie lie lie…….you never tell them what you feel. you need your yob.

great question do i think couples who are in shape have a better relationship than those that are fat

i don’t think size correlates to love. we like to put that on the big ones that maybe what they have is not the same and that there is a glory to size but i don’t believe it. the fight to be worthy is much imagination as the potion the few have. we have to remind ourselves we are good enough and though there is a blemish it is not before the heart.

great question is it easy to spot a quitter

rally fest fanatics.

great question if you buy your perfume at a drug store does that put a limit on what you will attract

even at Oyster Bay.

great question is it worse to spot a person pounding a nail or draining a roach

nail. opinion about weed that is higher than smokes. you feel better high than you smell like tobacco’s lost out house. wars were won with white sticks. think of that. yep. i don’t smoke. or weed. too sensitive. yep. heh, heh, heh, tell ya. being sensitive fucks you up. not a day goes by where i’m not bulled over by person’s outward behavior. til i get here and feel you come through this process called hope.

great question if you use a walker are you handicapped

no. cause you are so cute when you turn your trick pony around and sit and wait for metro mobility.

great question when do you give up on people

when you realize it is only the wind at your back.

great question when do you call your kid fat

i think when they get their first report card you breakout one of your own. that is so mean. no. you are not telling them you don’t love them, you are saying, lay off the tacos.

great question kid is getting baptize and it happens the little fucker carbonates that holy pond, do you have to change the water

take that stick o magic and fling a few drops of sanctimonious gatorade. if it is what you say it is than grace will come save the day.

great question do cremators have the best bbq

somehow, i would hope not. then again, when you see the dust what dust are you seeing…..could it be gus or could it be rust.

great question does sports make you affectionate

i should have been in sports so i could have been touched. as it is i struggle with affection. skitchy.

great question is it amazing we don’t fall down cause the earth is spinning

past five o’clock we’re all in the danger zone. in the midwest. where drinkers drink.

great question positive: the animal only knows your love

charming simplicity.

great question fart question: when the rockettes are synchronizing the ol shot to the gnads, are they gas propelled

i believe they are free of toxins come the letdown.

great question if black athletes held out for more money would it work

i don’t know how it could not. worth a shot. sports needs you. the way you handle balls. that means something.

great question would jebus sit in a sauna

i think he wood get flashbacks.

great question should there be a lotion restaurant

hey, lulu, get on that like you’ve gotten on thighs. thanks…..kid.

great question what is tough

not destroying your body in the midst of fleeting youth.

great question does europe have worse dancing than america

because we are carrying europe’s water i would say they might be better. if tourism was an army you might be relevant. shiiiiiiiiiit.

great question if the man has to take the woman’s last name is it game over for the poor fella

why should a women have to take a man’s name? because men are colder than women and able to separate love from the bone and in that conquest towards the epic thrones.

great question fart question: one conjoined farts do you blame both

equality.

great question since deer are so dangerous, can we just have the marines defend us every damn fall…….for a couple of weeks.

best to have line of defense against the wooded tyrants. taste. they taste good. that’s why wagyu is pennies on the pound.

great question do midwestern-ers have it tougher

if only we had a ocean…..if only, if only, we were overpriced and under fed you dreds. ha! i’ll get you to hate me yet. you are my scratching post.

great question would i go to cadillac seville row to get custom boxers

the whore-ra. uncouth in the teeth of fashion…….boooo!!!……heh, heh, heh. look at me i have clothes on and it is the first time i feel alive. oh golly i’m hot tonight.

great question what is the thrill with entertaining

come to where i sleep and shit. happy. now. gtfo. ooooph. i’ve never had people over. seems for the best.

great question should ballets dancers have to go through the nfl combine

would be some interesting route running replications. best part would be the drafting of cheerleaders. give the cheering community a big bone. heh, heh, heh. the cheering kind. dangerous, boisterous, obnoxious. as though you don’t know the ritual.

great question at what point does advice matter

ponies. old fat man knows nothing but knows the fathoms. unfathomable.

great question what does over twenty years of sobriety teach me

i can count

great question should you have to pay if you change your name

tax them without mercy. get the last ting of coin from the shallow pockets. why pick on me. we know how you will create misery.

great question do vegans love to take their blood pressure

take it and run you barnacle bullies. we care is that a crime? you annoy, that is a crime. it is not. in heaven it is. how would you know. i see between the clouds into angels quarters around the stars of tragedy we call suns.

great question if cows didn’t have babies would we have more milk

i know. where would we get the cows. just checking. their keeping score to ream me. well, you can ream me, but you cannot defeat us. we are bigger than a ream. we are the power of dreams.

great question should pphood doctor take the stuffing out of the thanksgiving turkey

technique may be flawless. grin might be obtrusive.

great question should gyms have babies you can exercise with

be nice. end give them that little kiss on the forward. see all the method rich strength junkies doing the baby curl. you are so impressive in your calculations. looking at me while i bench infinity.

great question is the compulsion to be in step with the liberal media overwhelming

one or two conservative voices and the whole world goes to hell. come on. we always need an enemy to look good to our friends.

great question oooooh, fart question: do people think, naturally, that fat people fart more than skinny people

sonsabitches……all there is to say, sonsabitches…..it’s true, but how dare you……no! how dare you donald moffat.

great question should men have antlers

be nice. woman could take one down. brag to friends of sixteen point buck.

great question cold falafel vs titlelist.

you can have horsey sauce with falafel. and that after bite swig of sprite from Bret will go real well.

great question would i sell a sock with best used by date

before death. shiiiiiiyeah!

great question is any attention good attention for women

that’s what you want us to believe. we are never respected the way we deserve. neither are rocks but they move on.

great question positive question: is there a limit you can swear to that fucking zipper merging asshole sonofabitch when your windows are up

fuck no. grip it and ad lib it.

great question are you depressed if you chew gum

i think. you are. doctor feel good – in the house. nurse-gee-a- teen. we’ll hold your time……and your head…..heh,heh,heh.

great question if you dunk should you be a window cleaner

i would think that would be the price of jump. careful not to jump around.

great question what would the kid have to do to make you the proudest parent ever

flush

great question deep question: should presidents have to wear a nutcup

heh, heh, heh. i fool. i did. good question. course, kennedy would not have it on his head. true. be nice to know if jackie was p.o’d and hauled off a nice punt, it would be denied its destination.

great question do you feel blessed if your kid is good looking

you don’t say it, but you say it.

great question deep question: if we solved lonely would we solve ourselves

there in lies the door.

great question when do you know aging is going to be tough

bank account. fat? fat too. can’t forget that misery.

great question is the internets good or bad

i think we are good and the barn rats find the worst of us to show us what they think is the best of us and then the farmer janes mix it into the dinner conversation only to whine when its rejected for it is only conjecture.

great question do you wash your hands after talking to terminal

thrice.

great question would it be okay if i brought the cards for my eye appointment

be nice. just sayin, if, if there were an opportune porn moment, that could be it. porn is for bad people. when normal is in stone we can begin to absolve you of your intolerance.

great question i don’t how i’ll make it. just feel more angry and frustrated than usual. my ability to be around people is being challenged greatly and i don’t know how to fix it. a part of it may be due to a medication change. or frustration in writing. or i have had enough of being around people. could it be i have a bad attitude? it is hard to rule that out because so much of the pain and misery is caused by a bad attitude. nothing really has to happen because i’m already at a point where i can’t handle much more. where is it all coming from and where is it all going. I don’t know. i don’t. what do i do? eat what i should not. sleep what i should not. go to mcd’s and be around people i don’t want to be around. I could hurt myself but that takes work and i am not in the mood. fuck. could it be tired of life at the moment. could be. maybe i’ve had enough and can’t go on anymore. won’t be the first time. need to go back on venlafaxine. i don’t know. i know this can’t go on. i am too miserable.

and going on venlafaxine helped greatly. yep. sometimes you need drugs and sometimes you want them. if your lucky its both.

the funny thing with mental health. it can change in a instant and then you are a different person and what was true half hour ago is no longer true now.

great question do i want sympathy

for what. all i did was to feel.

great question how much portal cache does your kid have if they play violin

ooooooph. big. does violin make you better person? well rounded. i’m rounded where is my fucking violin.

great question would jebus drop the f-bomb.

like to see what he really said. fuck what, doing what to me so they can sin like greed, fuck that noise. goddamn it. i ain’t a piece of wood. shitters. do and don’t do, get that fucking nail gun out of my site. eat some fish and call it a day. mother fuckers.

great question does all the future ever not revolve around who can be the most violent

tis the story. and of wit: it has come and been a nice guest. stories gather yet the blood is louder.

great question would i like to go down in history as the first person who put half n half in a cup of coffee

if that’s all i got, yes. hey, he was a son of a bitch. yeah, but he could cream.

great question fart question: is it wrong to fart on someone as they pass you biking

teach them to believe we are waiting for the word to tell me side of hell they are on. yes, i have to wait for the riders of glory to inform this sucker of simplicity the truth of their moment………the funny things is, it never gets old. if they were not so cute in their anti chafing movement. decals of the decrepit originality smarming all over the destinations of sin.

great question should you have to get a leggings license

seems fair. raise a lot money. ire. we have a right to wear what we want. so sez the sun to the moon. neither of which we care about after the dark becomes true.

great question have women died more pleasantly than man

tough. with all the wars i gander that man has been the prototype sufferer in the arms of agony. women suffer because of men. do you. do you really suffer knowing you are always right and the next women you see is your best friend to meet. man is flawed by strength of violence. it is a power we have yet to control.

great question if you listen to megadeath does that cancel out coldplay

cold-whaaaaaaaat? Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit

great question do i have the discipline to get to 319

I got there. now to go deep cause that is my problem. ha!

great question what good does it do to compare yourself to others

family. heh, heh, heh

great question fart question: would i fart in my wallet and call capital one

let that darling take a sawbuck out of me cabbage holder.

great question is it good animals can’t read

save our friends from the circles of hell called clubs of conversation. heh, heh, heh, funny cause you reading me now. Gazillion.

great question when will they open kardashian university

you’ve got to give credit to people for making things no one needs. heh, heh, heh. fist bump that.

great question if you don’t smile should you be allowed to keep your face

that face is mine. yeah. smile or lose the head. we’ll trow in the body for feed.

great question if you fight discrimination don’t you, secretly, want to be discriminated against

there you go. no. yes. you make more money with discrimination in the ring than not. pugilism. bah!

great question when is it impolite to not ask what the person’s handicap is

Democratic convention.

great question how does one own what they have not felt

rally.

great question how many pounds less do you weigh, as a woman, if you have great hair

ten to twenty. easy. get hair done and lose a little off the bum.

great question if i die and it is not me is it a success.

yes. and if it is me? so be it.

great question what if we are all okay

what’s okay? here. now. this.

great question is it tough to see kids that are smarter than you closer to theoretical success you

i am where i am. cannot change through the lives of others. i who must rise and only then will the view resemble a beauty onto glory.

great question if you stay within yourself are you okay

i think it means don’t vomit. i like to vomit. propulsion. if you are a wiener, you get out of work for the day. boss i vomited. oh, fuck, better get the world on notice somebody special is sick today.

great question positive question: is it grace that you can have a favorite pair of underwear

justice.

great question are their feminists in heaven

and all the faux dreams will be on site……..it’s coming. heh, heh, heh.

great question if you don’t march do you not care

shaming into believing is not american being

great question if you are dead but get revived do you have two birthdays

two crotch’s, two birthdays. what if i’m born again: than we all suffer an there will not be a birthday on the horizon but a rot in the wind.

great question deep question: can we be whole if our parents don’t let us love them in the end the way they did us in the beginning

i think selfless loving is the rite of passage to honor the soul athlete in us all.

great question what more do the handicaps have to prove

they want more able bodied people to volunteer for them. making the luckiest people alive serve them: the most unlucky of sorts. hoW hOW HOW!!!

great question would i be a better person if i read the economist

i don’t think the economist reads the economist. if you’re into that brevity thing.

great question would i be more hip if i read the vanity fair

i’ve looked for the patriotism in it and i’m still lookin.

great question why does everybody want approval over respect

approval gets you nothing but straight to the pasture of the ineffective. respect will move you in the forward.

great question what do we do with the people who still wear a mask

drop ass. from the inside out. beat em from the inside out. inside is your turf.

great question do i wish deer could trash talk

i do. fuck man, i’m in the woods, in the goddamn woods and you orange. what the fuck. shoot me. christ. i don’t even eat my young. shit. goddamn hollow point pushing mother fuckers. take your antler som of a bitch.

great question but didn’t they hunt in red dawn to stay alive

it’s okay. they had powers boothe. who the hell names their kid powers. it sounded good at the time. and the help me get home: busy but never precocious.

great question why don’t we just make the mean animals extinct.

lord knows i’ve tried.

great question do you ever really know someone

we know animals because we know their love. we should be so similar.

great question Hemingway a coward

i don’t know. he did not enter into the twilight but to save the theory of self. shame. does that make me a coward too? it does. if i had means and the splendor i don’t know if i would exit such a brunt manner.

great question bike lane question: is it the paint that makes a good bike lane

whine

great question bonus fart question: should first class cheer every time someone farts

“We have spirit yes we do, we have spirit how bout you?!”

great question what if they mixed fruity pebbles with coco pebbles

the best of times. the worst of times.

great question are you a better feminist the richer you are

that’s not fair. so it’s true. fuck you. so it’s real. go to hell. well, you are here. asshole. no! jerk face.

great question if you sell tires all day do you really want to put on more rubber at night

i don’t think you would feel up for mr good year

great question if you start to question if your parents loved each other is it only fair to question if they loved you

does it matter because you are here now? i don’t know. i think you would get some play out of thinking like that but it would not do you any good. eventually the undertow would demand of you.

great question do bass players belong to the masons

was there ever doubt…….heh, heh, heh

great question do you take a kid to the ballpark or to the bank

bank. there you have a better chance to save your money. shiiiiiiiit.

great question fart question: should foodtv come out as pro-fart

eaten all that som som and nothin from the bum bum. come on. talk to us. show us what the undercarriage is a cookin. maybe you afraid of our honesty. maybe you don’t like humanity. maybe, maybe you just save it for yourself and ping it off designer flatware. come to us on earth. we are only everything.

great question did jebus think how good that would look on indeed

saved humanity, hmmm, oh you did go to GW, good school.

great question better if the dog licks you or the cat

better if i lick you. licka licka

great question would i feel okay putting my septuplets on a sleigh ride.

keep one back. in case. lose most of squad. got prototype.

great question should there have been a opening sufferer for jebus

billy crystal. simple as a sliver. don’t want him to get hurt. always chipper. ever the prince.

great question do you remind the rioters to recycle

you riot you recycle. you are only for the best of things. we care. if that is a problem then why don’t you leave? your in the way of the future. excuse us. there is no excuse, only zuul.

great question what kind of refund can planned parent give you

veal.

great question what should be the threshold for being allowed to talk

get a license from bureau of wit. submit for approval. i have a right to talk. keep the mouth open. let the shooter find the target. you’ll make a noise all right…..ha!

great question do you realize the pressure to get the nails right for jebus considering the merch invovled

you don’t think like i think but you know like i know.

great question positive question: flowers the smile of nature

flowers are the inroad to the the heart of apologies.

great question what is the f-bomb rule if you are on speaker phone

let the expletives fly. aint your fault they think your potty trained. how often do you say sorry for the noise? never so you can get a big can of go shuck yourself. corny. i know.

great question how lucky am i

i would have to rate top ten percent of lucky people. very lucky. i don’t think i could count all the ways. oh, you think i forget about you. i will never forget my first readers.

great question does martial arts make you dancers

I think so. brave not so much.

great question how do you get to be a critic and not the art-eeeeeeeeast

flush

great question should they play living on a prayer as bumper music before mass

anything so stiffs dont take themselves serious. laugh it up. god rather we laugh than someone act as lord himself. a hunch. you thought so and we know so. atta us.

great question should there be a license to have kids

sexist. racist. disgusting. but it could help spike birth control and think of all the free time created. only the rich could afford kids then. no one said anything about money. that’s what you meant. no. sometimes the help people need is the help they can’t ask for. cryptic. how many people want the kid when they have the kid? i’d say south of fity. why not help the other half out. that is so wrong. saving lives is never first choice but damn if it isn’t the best choice. asshole. asswhole-a-mia.

great question do you not laugh to work at blood bank

obviously the juice is worth the squeeze so i don’t know why not.

great question are teachers and nurses interchangable

politically.

great question if oliver stone did the bible could costner play jebus

in his sleep. if, he ain’t hitten them chili dippers. sorry lee, we’ll get on that pronto.

great question fart question: should it be illegal to fart with but warmer on

ooooph, car, how you doin.

great question how do you know you didn’t mess up the kid

kid’s jewish.

great question were we meant to go to the depths of the sea

it’s there. just like the sphincter.

great question am i jealous type

i judge everything by the past i fight or the death in my pocket.

great question who first had the bright idea to save the earth

bobby mCgee

great question can i handle criticism

if i can pay my bills they can say whatever they want

great question what do you think when you meet people who are worse off than you

i should be so lucky

great question are women brave for not becoming men

to fight the good fight. to live the tough life. to never have the luger in the leggings. bravo.

great question how do you give the best abortion experience

hugs. has to be hugs.

great question fart question: if animals farted more would we love them less

who are we kidding. let me join you spindler, yeah, there, there is the big league chew. would they have cute febreze for fifi’s fab furry flatulent? where there is money there is opportunity. little can. sell it in the desolate aisles of pet store infamy.

great question is it okay that if you are losing weight you feel better than the person who doesn’t need to lose weight

badge of honor to be losing weight. almost better than anything. yes! i am almost becoming relevant. i will feel love and see it greater than the hot box.

great question can you think yourself energy

positive = energy. now, can energy be obnoxious = youth. what is the right amount of energy = wit.

great question how many guns do you need

whatever takes the place of the words coming out of your mouth

great question should there be special suntan lotion for the bits and pieces

don’t see target offering lotion for the balls. you don’t. or for the nips. no. nuts and bolts, we got burned.

great question could we have a holiday for all the people who are not us

we forget how important it is for people not to be us. in spirit we are one. heartache to heartache.

great question can your perfume make you better looking

the allure of the damned. sophisticated. sounds like truncated wit. smells like drunken love.

great question would it be wrong to add johnson n johnson baby shampoo to the baptism pool

get a whisk. move it around. tolerance is such the hassle. rituals idiot. diversity fool. don’t you dare bring diversity to a sacrament. so sorry frigidaire. heh, heh, heh. Gazillion. shiiiiiiiiit.

great question is women’s power alleged

once uttered twice true.

great question do vegans leer at melons

honeydew don’t mind if i do honey.

great question democrats want more humans but less waste, how’s that work

technically, if a person jumps they are not on earth. problem solved.

great question does lundquist sound like a good name for a pate

loverly.

great question if a bear hugged me would i lick its nose

i probably would. be a cute moment. then i’d be sacrificed as we demolish a nice loaf of haggis.

great question if i succeeded in d.c. would i ever have written to you

probably not. in failure we become friends. in victory we become legends.

great question does travel make you a better person

we almost missed you. let’s try again. no. keep it a secret. we’ll get your mail…..as far as you know.

great question would a immigrant be more attractive if it was a vegan

the elite immigrant no less. trained in the art of theory.

great question is humor poor man’s money

we can be rich in our caves and satisfied come history.

great question is american news treasonous

can’t help but think the rot subversive. it’s what freedom allows. as the gong hits for thee tis the ever living misery.

great question did the smallbones pray for world peace or just for money

i don’t know if i want to be the guy who caused world peace cause of his prayer. gee, that man scratches his but a lot. it’s okay mrs dorsey, he’s the peacemaker.

great question is soup dinner cereal

for the blessed. for us it is but the pool of desolate protein and unforgiving tater bobbers.

great question would you do cpr on chuck norris

only chuck norris could.

great question is it bad that i hug my cat

it’s what i have

great question is fear sexist

of course it is. more women are afraid then men. men are afraid of being accused. you should be. sick. you’re all sick. why is your afraid better than our afraid? cause you beat us up. why can’t it be good vs bad. it can and you are bad. we are only what we came here with. no! you’ve become the worst version of satan’s helpers. so, are we on for friday? fuck off. i take that as wait and see. never. until it firms its fluid. die. so flowers? you don’t listen very well. hard to listen when you are doing all the talken. you will die young. good to know.

great question if you drink tea does that cure you of wanting to hunt deer

bike lane. ride in a bike lane and you will never have to own a gun because you have unchecked power. shame it’s true, shame it ain’t new.

great question what do you call a writer that sweats

hourly.

great question would i like live music in the dental chair

for what they charge damn well better entertain other than to guess what sandwich you had in that two hour window you call lunch. for you too. us. kind of like the best damn thing going.

great question if i was the luckiest person in the world who would be second

joseph gayetty.

great question what would be the best day to groundhog

last day. enjoy knowing journey of no use to you now

great question if jebus can forgive porn why can’t we

they are the scourge of our time. and you? i’m a wonderful person once you get to know me. how long does that take? i’m on the metric system. of course. silly fucking me. good luck with that jack. we were going to do it. take you back. lose the bullet hole keep the flannel

great question could my dad have survived if he was divorced

he would crumble. he was dead to rights. is that wrong? no. blame is a boomerang after all.

great question best sport to be a locker room attendant

bushwood.

great question what do i think the average shot put shotter could shot a ballerina

solid fity yards. i would hope to hear a weeeeeeee. i’m a giver. fity-one.

great question does a tough abort satisfy the aborter or the abortee more

i would say the aborter because they are getting the benjamins. be able to sit and trow back some heat. say, hey that was real neat. maybe they could be opening band.

great question where do activists go when tragedy has not struck

in the hole. back with the rot of thoughts. wishing for tragedy to transform their malady.

great question what do i attribute the uptick of theoretical gum chewing deaths to of late

turrrible, turrible, turrible. chew gum in privacy of your own home. leave the rude out of the public. less the public rue the life out of you.

great question fart question: yoga teacher crop dusts, is it allowable for class to dust

fart and i will follow.

great question how many questions can you ask a person

its why you gotta size-m up fast………….how you doin………..heh, heh, heh.

great question is trump the best we can expect ourselves to be

he is the opposite. yes. biden was walking dead. trump is alive! he is evil. when you win you want respect and when you lose you want nothing of it. to what is the problem you fiends of frivolity.

great question are we better off

only in that we are still in the fight. never out of the fight. us. you. me. us.

great question would weather forecasters be more accurate if partook the wonderous weed be gone

as though there is honor among leaves.

great question was i a bad drunk

there was never enough but for the agony of the morning. to remember was impossible. to survive was cruelly upon me.

great question are you louder if you are saving earth

regrettably to the wankers among your tribe.

great question which is harder: saving the earth or having one good relationship

relationship. you don’t know. you don’t. are you saying the right thing? is it you? is it them? earth, put el can in el basket. wa-lah.

great question should you be allowed to talk if you did not get enough sleep

no. you are on drugs. fact. ooooph. those are the days. caffeine by the vein and truth come wain.

great question how dangerous is it to enter into a conversation with someone who owns a recumant bike

there are sinkholes and then there are sinkholes. this is the latter.

great question what kind of dog would i bring to join me in watching an execution

some people deserve to die. why do we have the intent to replay the wicked side of our season so as to please the reason? let them out in parts unresolved for answer bell of fate.

great question shoud they have vending machines at abortion clinics

what says abortion like poptarts. nuttin. little protein in cause a little protein out.

great question why would music make me want to save the earth

i would be a fool, a tool, a rigid stool. tell you what pediolytes, go to a planet-ariam. do they mention there are too many fucking kids causing the earth-be-woe-is-us, no. and why? hubba-hubba.

great question where do you go for the stamp so people will know you are an artist

cracker jax. how great is that to use sugar to sell the tat. and how can’t you love america. mmmmph. good for us. and them candy smokes. ha ha ha ahhhhhhhh, so damn funny. too much to enjoy. youth. we’ll get you yet.

great question will i be able to live on eating part of the longest bratwurst in the world

bun to? that would be silly.

great question do i think they have secret knocks at missile silo’s

you wonder. maybe, maybe they use the wit of the soul trapping coffee shop wizards and have a inclement question of the day. maybe.

great question if one supreme farts can they all fart along.

i would be guilty if i could see the pins lean in a direction come unison. ever the search for humanity we clamor. you. me. us. we good.

great question is rudeness an art

responding is.

great question last one of the early period. should you let a death row inmate pick their nose before you kill them

torn. i’m torn. keep em alive cost money. kill them cost money. money cost money. make it fair. let em loose in the woods with antlers and seem them glad handing hunters scram all over their body. they can have the trophy and we can afford the dead.

great question what would they put the fetus in at the phood to give to you

pickle jar. you keep in that brine and gone home the fridge is love. right next to teddy’s head of hope.

great question if a third world country solved baldness would we have to invade them

nudge. we’d nudge them a bit. a bit. in town a bit. mmmmmph. little back n forth can almost save movie.

great question turkey size of ton-ton, in the middle of worst winter snowjob ever an, vegan out in thick of it, would they cut open the turkey and nap in its belly

ooooph. i would. i think you would. they wouldn’t. would die as person of principle. which is nice. not for victoria. a woman with principles. god help us all.

great question what is it like being a HSP

days happen when pinballed mind has nowhere to go and the hits just keep aaaaahhhhn comin. you can say that again.

great question what age do you lose the appeal for being alive

you’ve come to understand you are not a giver.

great question do liberals think they know spanish better than conservatives

we are inclusive. sure you are mosley’s. sure you are.

great question would mary be safe because they hadn’t invented mint jelly yet

fire. don’t cross a lamb with fire mary, you don’t know who is coming to take it home.

great question would tawny have succeeded in mma

cleaned up. yep. could have been on fox force five. could have. the acting, not so much.

great question do i believe in vengence

i don’t think proving i can be as evil as someone is the way to go. course, there isn’t a person i would avenge for at the moment. does that gnaw at me soul? as annoying says too damn often: it is what it is.

great question why didn’t we see dinasaur testicles

just wondering. yep. go to a museum and see a wooly mammoth without a mammoth willy and you wonder, is there a arc-eee-all-a-gist with bowling balls of history. no, i don’t have jars of urine, but, i have……..THESE! BAM!

great question is my confidence different than most people

here i’m ten feet tall. in the forest i shrink. in my dreams i belong.

great question are diffusers my secret shame

other than that trunk i call a gut.

great question who could sell diving into a active volcano to the public

Donny Benet.

great question who thought of gobstoppers

tito puente. not that tito. the other tito. tito bandito. if words weren’t fun where would we be…….vanity fair. heh, heh, heh.

great question what was it like in the psych ward

car with no engine. hope with no truth. death with a view.

great question would it be nice to have sharks in freshwater

anything to take down the glib of water skiing nation. scribbling on humanity is not art.

great question how important is naming your runt

i’d sell the rights. damn straight. kid gonna have a nickname soon enough. and then what you got but empty wallet and that DARLING making reference to it on national urination system.

great question what would be fun for a kids birthday party

skeet shooting. all the fun of guns witout the animal in woe.

great question do you wonder if jebus could be ventriloquist

and then i say, hey, i have nothing against verne lundquist.

great question should bad attitude be treated as cancer

cancer you die. attitude we all die.

great question what do you do with the long talkers

drop ass. have to. almost begging for it. i’d cancel a couple to bring mr walsh back i would.

great question can we take a moment for all the care givers

no! think how good you look to heaven. better than the rest of us you selfish bitches. alas, we have to hear about it and the victory is no more. keep it to yourself and the glory will be unto you.

great question can you have that one bumper sticker and not be one of those people

i wish, but no. you are. it’s a statement. so is a closed casket.

great question person has that hoop in the ear. what’s that about

slip sliding away…….

great question when will we be able to wear paint instead of clothes

i bet you, five years. good for the planet. would i wear paint? I would rather wear thin. snarl, snarl, hissssssssssssss. down goes mr flamenco. left, right, left, right……down n out.

great question would i be alive if i owned a gun

no. i wouldn’t. not even close. do i own a rope? yes. thanks for the idea. pills are much the romantic way i think. typical. plus, i ain’t no small hawse, need some fine branch to tie that knot. would i use jebus cross? now your just playing games……why didn’t i jump…..that would hurt……yes being fat is a sentence unto itself. i think it is better to look good when you die. did i dress up? No. had other things on my mind. am i proud for having tried? no. am i ashamed? if i was it would only be to me. is it scary? scary part is you don’t know how it will end. as a veggie or not. why don’t you try harder? i’ll keep that in mind. you are a failure. and yet you are talking to me. have you no shame. i did what i did because it was the best choice on a bad run of things. less the day comes when grim is on your shed-will. Innocent of agony is not the train to divinity.

great question how caustic is see you next tuesday

it doesn’t matter because it is a glorious turn of phrase. so offensive. and thus it’s glory. you would not like to be called one. i would enjoy it for the passion that trails in its offing. you are a bastard. honey, after a certain age we all are. jerk……what’s that smell,……oh, it’s victory for i am, i am the one, the only, jerkface.

great question is music meant for short people

yes it is. fat people? toga.

great question how big does a spoon have to be before it is a serving spoon

first, you need a lot of time on your hands. i prefer to hoist it from the trappings of the grind. then after a half pound of the finest pudding around i lift into the pit of my pius pus promptly. heh, heh, heh. wordle, you ain’t got nuttin on us. we are the nation.

great question why do we think we can save the world

because we believe people care……..heh, heh, heh. oh the hill that is never there for the victory always somewhere in somewhere land.

great question does planned parenthood need to advertise

women know a good thing. they know murder is okay when you wear a uniform.

great question best way to a great marriage

black underwear

great question why do women have them long winter coats

subterfuge. no, so they can carry the sawed off weaponry ready to unleash pent up misery on the man, when they can, how they want. we’re lucky to be among the sisterhood of traveling misery.

great question what if you raise your kid a vegan since birth

doctor, coco told me to fuck off and die and then she went to ethiopion buffet, what did i do that would cause such a travesty? tofurkey? yes, but it was a good year for tofurkey. there is never a good year…..i know, i know. what is wrong with me? come back for another session and we will dig deeper into your recession.

great question what happened to 70’s disco music

as went the roller derbies, as went the glory.

great question could we grease up some of the ballerina’s at the end of the show

damn right we can. slimy suckers. then we can hook em and toss em into seas of infamy for the catch of our destiny. maybe hit the old man and the sea. alas, giving was never the shadow of your dreams.

great question how do you sell perfume on tv

sell envy. sell the shit out of it. that person will need it to be whole. then, you will have their labor’s juice in the drink of your vice.

great question which crashes first: internet or sports

not vegas. sly champions are they. lure them in with the buffet jim and then pounce on them in when they open up.

great question is it sun tanning if yuz all alone

have to have that conversation you’ve been looking forward to all week because life is so hard and all you want is a break from it all. that’s what you need when you tan: melancholy vomit.

great question are booofaaaay’s the same as prostitution

reckon they are. the sadness sullen so someone can ram a dinero into their hangry pockets of poison……no one forces someone to eat. when you put cheap feed out you know exactly what you are doing……called business. at least offer some bullets and a weapon of choice cause no one leaves the boooooofaaaaaaaay alive.

great question do i think vladimir putin uses ball in a cup

ball in cup tough. ball. cup. how do you get that little fucker in there. swing some stick.

great question can you take your baby to petco and get its nails trimmed

can’t hurt. maybe burp the fucker, maybe. maybe burp petco staff. probably like. burp me. topside burp. of course. i have boundaries. two comforters. four pillows. two blankets. two electric blankets. and a goddamn gallon of gasoline if i’m cold. fear wakes me up. the cat keeps me up. job awaits. dark is the direction. light is the forgotten. then put on a happy face. heh, heh, heh.

great question how big should the biggest steak be

doug

great question you can spank a baby but not a dancer, what the hell

we are so damn funny. if it weren’t true it could never be false.

great question who would jebus want as a cross mate

frank caliendo. you don’t see a black comedian impersonating white person. probably a reason. probably pretty good. inteteresting. all right then.

great question is being around people more important than money

i think if you have the holy grail you don’t need people just a good god damn writer.

great question if you play bridge do you like them club sandwhiches with the tooth pick that has the little flashy paper at the top

yes you do. bridge. for the elite. the ones who got the ample suck of the teet.

great question would aliens like yoga

new mexico aliens. a lot like new mexico relevance. somewhere, somewhere……..

great question cure cancer or save the planet

cure the planet lovers of the cancer they have on our souls. i’m saving the earth, what are you doing? melancholy vomit.

great question do vegans get corns

organic no less.

great question do vegans like to do dishes

I think they like to do anything they can talk about

great question do they play bridge in prison

heh, heh, heh.

great question is it masturbation to mail yourself a birthday card

antiseptic though it is.

great question am i an artist

i am the end of me and the beginning of us.

great question when do you need security

when the ire opposes your mental flowers.

great question if, if they used a ferret and not a nice marmot, would i have been able to tell the difference.

farrah fawcett maybe.

great question if i had girl as a child would i be a feminist

that is a trick question. putting love of a child before power hungry of the time. course i would want the world. doesn’t mean the battle of the crotch is over. all for show. you make your own life. lucky to care about two people let alone uno. dose. tres. mcfarland.

great question how do you de-dick a man

divine intervention.

Great question does it end

has it begun. if you are here the revolution is real.

great question do you shower in january

midwest. we shower in the summer and we cower in the winter. in the middle we just cry ourselves clean.

great question is it true english majors own rc cola

they run the word gambit and never let me in. til we become one and then the whole world will wonder where we were when we were there then.

great question why do they emphasis the size of the toilet paper roll

oh, now that there is a bigger roll, i can finally shat the bigger load. thank you big roll people for making my life bettter and my ass lighter. golly gee i’m free to pee.

great question would it be wrong to bring salt an pepper to communion

i think they would want jebus to have flavor. when you trow back the communal hootch they might get suspect.

great question when did my dad realized my mom would never leave him

when he realized she changed the diapers and he had none of the duty for the duty. little fear done him good.

great question can you tell the level of trauma by the number of tattoos

there you go. yep. that is not fair. fair and true. you are a bastard. and you have me in your shights do you?

great question how does being a lesbian make you manly

they know the danger living inside their holster of purity.

great question is it possible for pphood doctor to call in sick

same thing with an execution. can’t kill today, got turf toe. seen it once seen it a thousand times. fish. barrel. christopher it gaveth and it tooketh. thus the scores to be settled.

great question would it be funny if i seasoned my balls before a physical

oh, mmmmph, cinnamon. you shouldn’t have. thing is, in pad town, always room for one more. window open assures vacancy.

great question do nudists have a nude santa claus

might be a rough ride down the chimney. if, if he is hung like the chimney with hair.

great question would i put a musky in kids stocking

never too young to noodle. worse case scenario you create another arc of mayhem.

great question do i keep looking for the day when it all went wrong

i do wonder when i had confidence and i just cannot seem to find it.

great question drugs are illegal but guns are not

make ATF illegal. at the very least make them add a m once in a while. ouch. ouch. it funny. down front.

great question since nothing matters, what is the point

made in the usa.

great question should we park the word whippersnapper

let scrabble comense the exoneration. or maybe i’ll just get my intake of language up from the lowest ranks of raunch.

great question can there be racism in porn

sexism first. than if there is time we can look into it. so everything starts with sexism? damn right. why? we have to fight twice as hard. so does porn. you are rude. funny and rude. still a jerk. heh, heh, heh.

great question has deodorant had its hay-day

i think they are having a helluva time. taint like sweat comes thru new. it’s just sweat. must be rough when you just can’t get it right. that would be the pits. yes. fuck off, that is damn funny.

great question would it be wrong to own a piece of the cross

be okay to show it to people in the biffy. good flick.

great question history is being made, isn’t that great

plugging up a crapper on air force one would be history worth noting. history. the orphan in our lexicon.

great question should there be a beauty pageant for people who complain about them

woof woof! awooga! dive dive dive!!!

great question is it good to trip your kid once in a while

there it is. active parenting. good stuff. let the scabs heal. might need a new hip. but, today’s hips are at tomorrow’s prices.

great question should we hate you if you can lick your feet past sixty

among other reasons.

great question do more men protect women than women protect men

your welcome. it is only from other men. you’re still welcome. jerk….scratch a little deeper, i’m a keeper: jerkface.

great question do you sleep better if you are smaller

it’s a taught spoon.

great question would wonder woman get a mani/pedi

After she joins DAR.

great question if the pope blesses a mackerel and gives it to neil diamond, can it be a holy holy mackerel

you reach for the sun and you get burned. you reach for the moon and you’re lost. but you reach for the joke and you are found.

great question should you get handicap parking if you have three testicles

i could argue no, but damnit it would be a honor to let that person, carrying one more for the great road ahead, to have my parking spot. i do think you wood have to have the three testicle scrotum on the ticket. how could you tell the difference. lumps. look for the lumps. it’s not that hard.

great question are prison’s death’s restaurant

melancholy vomit.

great question where in the bible does it create the pope

my god how we get led astray. nothing but fear. that anyone knows anymore than the next person about it all. puh-leaze

great question do you give napkins to nudists

give em to the night for they have ruined the day.

great question are the secret lives we lead the best comfort to us

truly the nest of contentment. the nook in our swath. the rest from piercing lazers come often. you can’t judge what you don’t know…….boo! ha!…..baaaauuurn. good luck with dat i say today and know it will come at you tomorrow. it will never end and i will never die.

great question do i feel i am a bad person because i am sad more often

i feel i am a bad person because none of this is real but for the hope to its appeal.

great question is not everything we do an act of god

take a toke……all right…..if, if all prayer is but us being part of another persons prayer, then, by technicality we are prayer and prayer alone and in that we are not physical but orbiting love in the vast space of time…..good luck finding your way home.

great question could we trap fat people at buffets

then we take their toy collection….heh, heh, heh. transformers. just like we did with our bodies.

great question should scarfs be stronger so the tree’s don’t get ruined

you should be ashamed. and in theory, you should have been removed from this play of emotions we call life. i have a purpose and a heart. i have surface and fart. you are a pig. no bacon for you. i would never eat your bacon. and i wouldn’t want you to enjoy yourself. jerk. and how far you have come. tis, jerkface.

great question will i ever be close to anyone

Fair. don’t know. the more i write the better the chance. i fear i am not able to feel a lot of emotions. not bad. saves time to get back to where you feel comfortable.

great question are we lucky i am not in a mexican prison

that silver lining.

great question do people who protest want something they cannot define

I get the impression that they would all be more quiet if they all had more money. wave some green lean paper teams at em and see the grovel. we want, oh, money, i like money, what was i saying, oh, no matter, money. i really like money. i’ll buy that sweater now and eat out a bit. i’ll be here a bit.

great question should their be the running of the pretty people at premium grocery stores

yes! let us looks at the specimens of better living through chemistry experiment gone well.

great question are the tougher women the ones with the shorter hair

yes! an the smokes on the sleeve and the mean on the tongue. woof!!!

great question is this hope

in the raw

great question should imagination feel so good

worked for biden

great question when i talk to my dead cat is it as bad as it sounds

probably. it ain’t as if i am stopping something that makes me feel all right.

great question worse comes to worst, can you always sell your body

men don’t have to sell their body. your right! we just have to buy yours.

great question what is the future for abortion

live music. in a gadda da vida. your welcome. or, t-shirt: i ate my lunch but left my baby at rick’s house of suction. t-shirt is a work. live music. make it what we never thought it could be, because, that is america. being what you never thought you could be.

great question does it make you more of a man to complain about the men in power

don’t i mean people. no i don’t. cause man has to believe he can do a job better than any man so he has pride when he grills for the people he would rather not have in his life. heh, heh, heh. happy holidays.

great question truth hunter or truth dodger

either way you get it so what’s the difference. shiiiiiit.

great question how do women come to the conclusion it is there baby

cause it is in our body. good luck with that. i think dr pol can remedy that. no! our body. really. and that traffic jam of a rump? fuck off. hence the rump.

great question if you work at home do you close the bathroom door

not while you are in your jammies.

great question if i was sweet talked would i help to save the earth

delivery. all in the delivery and the reflexes.

great question is there less dignity at a cat show than a dog show

less money. then the fur less cats. when it all goes south. for god sake, give that feline some flannel. shiiiiiiiit.

great question why do you think if you don’t get what you want that it is wrong

we deserve it. you certainly do.

great question if you ask someone what’s new shall you behead

no one will think less of you there will just be less of you to think of.

great question is procrastination related to mayonnaise

I don’t know how but i know that it is. if i know, you knew, tyler knew.

great question should you go to jail if your kid is fat

put the kid in jail. toughen up. use too many aprons.

great question fart question: do you fart when you go into hr or do you fart as you leave hr

both. good plate coverage. oh, meeting is short. too bad. this one’s gonna run a little long.

great question have fat people caused global warming

no. ours are not methane. taco.

great question was showering with a man at the hospital the worst thing that could happen

i was so filthy i didn’t care. i was more upset they sold me bathing utensils while i was vulnerable. sonsabitches. not a stitch and they give the sales pitch. mmmmmph. fuckers.

great question are vegans happier because they would not eat roadkill

we won’t eat roadkill either. don’t means we’ll swerve either.

great question do you have to change a coma’s clothes

fuck that noise. let em be. maybe water em. weed em. have fun because i’d be upset if i woke up after a couple of years and there were tears. at the very least, start a pool. go overboard with it. how many farts a day. will they purr. you don’t know. you don’t. we have fun and we talkin. we talkin.

great question is liberalism funny because it is one of the leading ways to justify your sadness

we are not sad, we care. the definition of sadness is to care.

great question do you enforce the no facial hair rule on the lady

tough. i say go the other way and have them go to town. bearded women are good for bidness. what bidness, i don’t know. something not with kids. maybe a graveyard shift at the crematorium. no pressure. heat and serve.

great question why do the handicap look like handicap and not supermodels

i think you have to play the part. and you play it so well.

great question if you have done over a tousan aborts do you feel like you killed a small texas town

probably don’t think of it. you have to know what your number is. put that next to your sleep number. honey, that is a big sleep number. oh, there’s sleeping, but that ain’t the number.

great question who has the best snot rocket

i want to say godzilla. i go gumby. damn it. what about jolly green giant? why is he so jolly? mmmmm, yep. on drugs. no one is jolly anymore. we have been stripped of our here to fore.

great question fart question

which state uses the most febreze per capita

i know, we think texas. california? ocean breeze. nope. canada.

great question do vegans feel like the filling in a oreo cookie

they are cozy are they not. yeah warm and cozy and a bit fucking nozy.

great question better knowing no one cares or believing that they do

how you doin

great question would like to leave floaters in rae’s creek

jim, it appears the ball is floating in the creek

nick, i don’t think the balls have corn in them.

ahhhhhhh, someday. what’s the caddie doing nick?

Jim, it appears he’s not using the other hand today.

great question can we all say we are victims of hate but saved by love

love should be softer for the hate come shine it so.

great question should there be a funeral when a woman lets their roots show.

when they wash their leggings.

great question can a fat person have a thin pet

call them models.

great question is this one of the best things i have done in my life

it is. thank you.

great question if it’s legal, is it love

still a fumble.

great question if npr gave me mouth to mouth and i lived, would i still get to choose whether to donate or not

it would look bad, but i might have moved on. thanks for the frenchie, but i will not let loose the money.

great question would i adopt?

I’d like to see the person in me who would have a chance to.

great question would it be wrong to sell little bottles of hootch to little people

that is rude. you have to wonder. like you have not. when we stop questioning we start thinking we might know something and we don’t. we don’t. keep em coming, keep em guessing.

great question am i a self made man

i don’t care how i’m made as long as i am.

great question is it okay to theoretically kill someone on a holiday

i’ll tell you right now, push buttons, don’t matter the day and you stand the very good chance of a theoretical kill. that simple.

great question is it okay to have a theoretical hump

how you doin

great question would jebus chew gum

i don’t think he could chew the fat

great question if a gymnastic participant and a ballerina were in a cave, who would eat who

i know we are both thinking ballerina is on the menu. yep. and its true. them gymnastic participants are tough. good catholic girl.

great question should you be able to go to a tanning salon and walk away with a farmer’s tan

if you go to a tanning salon you still leave a lot behind……called dignity.

great question if your cat is on a youtube video would they be considered actors

they make the same. they eat the same. they lick the same. they are the same.

great question do people want rules to be a la carte

yes they do. when it’s good for you it’s only then that the world is right. bah!

great question should leggings have the same names as beenie babies

lulu, you have work to do

great question since the tay has big time security could we just transfer over into congress

in time. before the aging sets in.

great question if trump had a cat would he be more likeable

the more blood to go around for the carnivores the better.